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While I'd rather not go into my personal bits and pieces, let's just say I've seen plenty of depression in my life -- which is probably why your apparent reckless attitude touched a nerve: It's one thing to come off them when you want to, it's entirely something else to risk doing yourself further damage out of a sense of "rebellion".

Again, I know I sound preachy, so let's just say I'm just responding to how you made it sound... I'm sure it's not quite the way you put it.

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While I'd rather not go into my personal bits and pieces, let's just say I've seen plenty of depression in my life -- which is probably why your apparent reckless attitude touched a nerve: It's one thing to come off them when you want to, it's entirely something else to risk doing yourself further damage out of a sense of "rebellion".

Again, I know I sound preachy, so let's just say I'm just responding to how you made it sound... I'm sure it's not quite the way you put it.

I don't think I've ever done anything out of a sense of rebellion. I'm probably the least Rock & Roll person since Bach.

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I don't think I've ever done anything out of a sense of rebellion. I'm probably the least Rock & Roll person since Bach.

Bach was fucking rock and roll.

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I don't think I've ever done anything out of a sense of rebellion. I'm probably the least Rock & Roll person since Canadian vocalist Sebastian Bach.

Hey, I like Skid Row.

--

Okay, that wasn't funny.

Things are a bit weird over here. Lots of changes and/or anxiety-inducing situations coming to boil at once.

- My girlfriend moved out this week. We're coming to the end of the tenancy anyway, and it was agreed that she'd move back home (Finland, in this case) - so we've not 'broken up', really. Nevertheless, it was/is still damn weird, as we've pretty much lived together for 3 years, with most of that being at university. And this year, we were the entirity of each other's social lives, as moving to London wasn't the social renaissance we'd hoped. So, doubly jarring, as that's a great big - not necessarily romantic - void in my life.

- Apart from moving flat, which brings with it a frustrating amount of bureaucracy, sitting in council offices, and talking to ISP/gas/electricity/etc people on the phone, I'm also starting a Master's course in History of Film and Visual Media. Which is awesome on the one hand, but also quite intimidating.

- Career-wise, I'm worried. I started seriously as a writer just under a year ago, from pretty much a standing start - and taking that into account, I've come a long way (scores of film/gaming articles, of all kinds), but I'm the kind of person who always wants to keep pushing, and I'm afraid I've hit a plateau. There's not much work in the paid sense on the horizon, and even the current relationships - with sites and editors and the like - I have are starting to stagnate a bit. Makes me feel like I'm not dynamic, dickish, lucky or arrogant enough for it. And most of the 'success' I've had has been more subtle or oblique, as opposed to career-advancing. I'm quite proud of some of the pieces I've written, and have been thrilled to have them published in some good places - but apart from the immediate kudos of publication, I'm not sensing much for the long game.

Hey, that's all wonderfully cathartic and mostly incoherent. Maybe I'll join a gym!

Edited by Nevsky

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Groucho, do what you need to but be careful. Coming off anti-depressants where possible is certainly something I'd encourage (Likewise not feeling ashamed of taking them if you need them - the stigma around it is such bullshit). One guy I know found he could come straight off his if he made time to do buddhist meditation as a substitute every day (and he's as irreligious as they come, he sees meditation as a very practical, psychological thing, rather than turning it into hippie bullshit).

---

Today, I absolutely killed my former best half marathon time (1h55m) by clocking 1h42m. I'm well chuffed considering I managed very little training and was getting rid of a cold this time last week (my legs are fucked for now though). I reckon if I train really hard next year, I might be able to beat 1h30m.

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I don't think I've ever done anything out of a sense of rebellion. I'm probably the least Rock & Roll person since Bach.

Hehe, well you were the one who used the word rebel, that's all.

Anyhoo, I don't own Splosion Man or Castle Crashers, but I probably should. GTA multi-player is my big thing at the moment, though.

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Weekend before last I took a break from indulging the self destructive spiral I love so much to help with this day out type thing for kids with Down's and other disabilities. We had a barbecue and took them out on the Thames - it was pretty cool.

To even out this uncharacteristic good deed I repeatedly smashed the kids at connect 4. They were rubbish.

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Well crap.

I just heard that I won't be getting a new contract at my current job. This means that per October 1st I'm out of a job :( Damn recession :(:finger:

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Gah fuck, the cheap refurb Xbox I got off of ebay RRoD'd (a gamble admittedly, lasted two weeks and seemed problem free until I tried to turn it on this morning).

It obviously has no warranty, but my Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts is stuck in the disc tray. I'm currently ordering up some thermal paste and machine screws, going to have a crack at taking it to bits and fixing the innards using a few online guides. Even if I don't succeed, it'll at least have been fun (very expensive fun, but I'm hoping to recoup some of that by flogging the parts) and I got to play TLAD. I've a very seriously broken one that's still under warranty, so I'll send that away to Microsoft like I meant to beforehand.

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Gah fuck, the cheap refurb Xbox I got off of ebay RRoD'd (a gamble admittedly, lasted two weeks and seemed problem free until I tried to turn it on this morning).

It obviously has no warranty, but my Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts is stuck in the disc tray. I'm currently ordering up some thermal paste and machine screws, going to have a crack at taking it to bits and fixing the innards using a few online guides. Even if I don't succeed, it'll at least have been fun (very expensive fun, but I'm hoping to recoup some of that by flogging the parts) and I got to play TLAD. I've a very seriously broken one that's still under warranty, so I'll send that away to Microsoft like I meant to beforehand.

there is a manual way to open the tray, under the face plate.

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Hehe, well you were the one who used the word rebel, that's all.

Anyhoo, I don't own Splosion Man or Castle Crashers, but I probably should. GTA multi-player is my big thing at the moment, though.

I own GTA but haven't played it in a while. Maybe I'll jump in on one of the Grand Thumb Auto sessions.

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Do you get unemployment benefit?

I can apply for that. But I've still got a job for 3 weeks and hope to line up a new job in the mean time.

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This means that per October 1st I'm out of a job :(

Me too, but I start again at November 1st.

But I still need to find a new place to live :/

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I can apply for that. But I've still got a job for 3 weeks and hope to line up a new job in the mean time.

Good luck! To you elmuerte also.

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Arghhh, why the fuck do I always fall for women who live over a hundred miles away. I really don't know if I can go for a long distance relationship at the moment.

In other news I convinced my mum to give her boyfriend another chance after they had a fight, due to the fact it's the happiest she had been in years.

Also it's my Aunts wedding tomorrow and I expect to get very drunk.

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I don't need a root canal!

I got an official invite to the Film Festival's opening black tie gala with an open bar! (My girlfriend will be appropriately dressed, but has a blue mohawk at the moment, so this should be interesting)

Everything at work broke tonight, meaning a ton to do, lots of stress, and me actually having to put out a (literal) fire!

So, y'know. Hit and miss.

EDIT: I just realized I structured my life as a Thumb! Thumb! Thumb! review, but don't have the thumbs to back it up.

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Haha Miffy, your posts always balance out with some moderately good things at the start and then a generally shit thing at the end.

All of the parts for Xbox repair should be here by next week, so I'll have fun tearing that apart. Not that I'll have any time, freshers' week starts on Monday.

Actually looking forward to it now. Kind of wanted to just not go, work full time at the new local Tesco that's being built and concentrate on writing, but decided I needed to get out a bit more. Plus I'll just join the gaming society and hang about with all the neckbeards for a while until I make some proper new friends.

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Plus I'll just join the gaming society and hang about with all the neckbeards for a while until I make some proper new friends.

...or grow a neckbeard...:mock:

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Ugh. If you've ever watched a relationship disintegrate in slow motion, you'll have some idea of how my night went.

If the two people involved are two of your best friends, you'll have a better idea.

If you also found out that one of them may have cancer, you're almost there.

Excuse me while I go drink myself to sleep. I'm already pretty drunk as a result of the evening, so this drinking will be done with hot chocolate. Nice, comforting hot chocolate.

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I called the cops on some dudes setting up a bonfire outside my house last night.

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I had another worthless weekend, feeling miserable and alone! Need to get a hang of this "having a life without gf" thing... Bah.

Also, my mother may be seriously ill. We don't know for sure, yet.

On the plus side I finally found that last sodding pigeon -- take that GTA :shifty:

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