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Well, I'm off to Australia and won't be back until next year. Hopefully I've packed all the right things and won't be put in Australian jail for trying to smuggle in Norwegian dirt. Have a merry Christmas and happy New Year.

Enjoy spending Xmas in the baking hot, summer sun! :tup:

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Yeah? Well.. I'm going to spend Xmas with my husband and some cats, so... so there.

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I'll be spending Christmas with my girlfriend's family as mine live in another province, then flying out to see my own parents on Boxing day. Should be fun enough. My mum tells me they just got a new kitten, so I get to spend a week away from home playing with a 2 month old kitty! Good times...

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So hey, remember that time I complained about that girl I liked, and said I was moving on?

Well, she and I spent some time together recently, were intimate, and then today she lands the shocker that she still loves her first boyfriend. i thought to myself what the fuck.

Also my best (female) friend from my college told me tonight that she's liked me for a long time and that my complaining of girl has been torturous for her.

oh man

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So hey, remember that time I complained about that girl I liked, and said I was moving on?

Well, she and I spent some time together recently, were intimate, and then today she lands the shocker that she still loves her first boyfriend. i thought to myself what the fuck.

Also my best (female) friend from my college told me tonight that she's liked me for a long time and that my complaining of girl has been torturous for her.

oh man

Oh hey, I've been here. Good luck, man. Do the right thing. Figure out what the right thing to do is, and then do the right thing. Don't do the easy thing; don't do the desired thing; do the right thing. I know that should be painfully obvious, but the irony of the situation is that you know the right thing is what you should do, but not what the right thing is. If that made sense.

Good luck!

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But who is the right thing for? For me? For other people? Do I do the right thing by me and (probably) move past girl A? Or is the right thing for me to pursue and live a long happy life with her? Or do I get rid of her, and start thinking about what girl B said? Do I just tell girl B flat-out No? Who am I doing the right thing for?

(Also yes, this is exaggerated - eg. long happy life etc. Just getting a point across.)

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Just follow your penis.

Don't listen to any advice I give.

When you said that she was still in love with her old boyfriend I thought "ABORT, ABORT!", because that sounds like a major hassle and I've rarely seen similar situations end well... Really, let her get her shit together and maybe in the future start something without all kinds of baggage you don't need. Or never.

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Having been in the situation of still being in love with an ex for a long time, I can tell you that you don't want to get involved with that. She needs to get over her ex before she can really be in a healthy relationship. So IMO the best thing to do would be to back away from that.

When you have, what you do with the other girl depends on whether you like her or not. But these are two separate situations, so treat them as such. Not going out with Girl A does not mean you have to go out with Girl B. Of course, then you're alone, but that can be the best solution.

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All this is stuff I know is probably right, but is making me feel very sad, lonely and depressed today. Damnit.

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Having to choose between two girls is a poor reason to feel alone :P

Erm, what I said before stands, you're not actually choosing between them.

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Run away from girl a (she won't get it together any time soon), have a talk with girl b and work out if you like her; go home and fap until not depressed.

THERE I HAVE SOLVED IT

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Oh, I'm not talking about choosing between them. I just literally feel left abandoned by girl A. I know it's illogical but I'm only human.

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Oh, I'm not talking about choosing between them. I just literally feel left abandoned by girl A. I know it's illogical but I'm only human.

I'm frankly surprised it ever even got this far considering how things went the first time. Speedy, her telling you this is basically saying "HEY WELL THIS WAS FUN BUT I HAVE STUFF TO DEAL WITH OK BYE" and giving you an easy out. This is more than most people get! She's not abandoning you because, really, she was never with you. You just had a nice moment together; it's not sustainable, but you can keep the moment.

So regarding Girl A you have two options:

a) Say "oh well ok bye" and carry on with your life, leaving her to deal with her own shit by herself like a grownup (this will take a long time, DO NOT DO THIS IF YOU'RE THINKING 'I WILL LET HER DEAL WITH IT AND THEN GET WITH HER' BECAUSE THE 'THEN' IS MOST LIKELY NOT GOING TO HAPPEN BEFORE YOU FORGET ABOUT IT)

B) Become embroiled in an endless spiral of uncertainty and drama that will make you feel like a super special emo snowflake and will certainly keep you busy and entertained, and give you lots to write about in your journal. (Don't do this. Just don't.)

Regarding Girl B, what you have is a girl expressing her attraction to you. What do you do? You consider: are you attracted to her? Is she interesting, intriguing and stable? Do you like the idea of being with her? If the answer to any of these questions is "yes" then by all means ask her out and see if there's chemistry there and the interpersonal dynamic is fun and satisfying.

Don't worry, it's really not as complicated as it seems.

TL;DR what subbes said.

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go home and fap

THERE I HAVE SOLVED IT

The solution for all things!

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The solution for all things!

No wonder my turkey didn't come out very well this Thanksgiving!

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Do I do the right thing by me and (probably) move past girl A? Or is the right thing for me to pursue and live a long happy life with her?

There's nothing to pursue, Speedy. As I told you about 15 pages ago, she doesn't fancy you and is coming up with bullshit excuses. Now she's given into carnal desires and shagged you, she's had to step those excuses up a notch. The good news: she doesn't find you physically repulsive. The bad news: nothing further is going to happen. The best you can hope for is to be the guy she goes to for sex when she's desperate/horny enough to stop worrying about hurting your feelings, which will eventually lead to a lack of respect for you from her and yourself.

Cut contact, like I (and many others, apparently) told you, and like you said you were going to. Wait until you are absolutely over her and the fact that you can only be friends, to the point where you will turn down any physical approaches because you know you'll just get emotionally entangled again.

As for the other girl, I dunno but it sounds like you're not that into her. If you are/could be, give yourself a couple of weeks to clear your head, then reappraise. If you're still having to ask yourself whether it's worth pursuing her, then it's not. You'd be doing it just to have someone, and you'll break up with her soon after once you realise that. If you are genuinely interested in her, though, then you'll already be in an infinitely better starting position that with Girl A.

Listen to me and Sal and Subbes, before this happens:

B) Become embroiled in an endless spiral of uncertainty and drama that will make you feel like a super special emo snowflake and will certainly keep you busy and entertained, and give you lots to write about in your journal.

But for journal, read "The Idle Thumbs Life Thread". You're starting to sound like Tanu, ferchrissakes.

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