Chris Posted May 10, 2005 Ha ha, don't be silly! There's no way anyone could fit into the same room as an Xbox. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lailoken Posted May 10, 2005 he just became part of the hollywood lifestyle obsession. funny, the same thing happened to the guys at ENRON... let's see where this is going... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
n0wak Posted May 10, 2005 I didn't know Microsoft marketed their employees, too!Next up: Bill Gates? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jake Posted May 10, 2005 Plastic surgery? Shaved his head, lost weight, got in shape, took care of his skin maybe? J Allard probably has a very scary Lifestyle Manager. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Intrepid Homoludens Posted May 11, 2005 I don't think it's plastic surgery. To fit in with a more hip, sexy image that Xbox is trying to project, he most likely underwent an intense change in lifestyle. He probably works out a lot now, eats very healthily, and generally takes very good care of himself. That is anything BUT scary. Personally, I don't think he's a goodlooking man to start, he's in his late 30s, and when you put his type in the most bleeding edge trendy clothes, they tend to look creepy, desperate, and as if they're grossly overcompensating for something. Whoever his stylist is should tone him down, get rid of the dumbass eyewear, and dump the Matrix look and try something else (Helmut Lang suits and Banana Republic basics would do). My money would be on making him look so cool and stylish that the teenagers who like Xbox shit would wanna look like him when they grow up. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lailoken Posted May 11, 2005 shit and I thought Matrix style was still the latest fad... fuck this, I'm changing back to jeans... god damn hippies! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Intrepid Homoludens Posted May 11, 2005 The Matrix look is among the most dumb and pretentious styles I've ever seen. It's basically a nerd's idea of what 'cool' looks like. Believe me, I've worked in the fashion industry for over ten years. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spaceship789 Posted May 11, 2005 Jeezurs! In one of the photos has fall 2001 behind it, he is fat and chunk with big arms. In four years he is quite skinny. I would dream of having such an incredible transformation as J. Allard! I can only guess that: - he is naturally skinny, but ate fast food daily during one stage of his life. - he is so filthy rich he has a treadmill in his private jet. - talking is the best trigger for metabolism I think its good that he lost weight - less strain on his heart - but I think many of us hold affection to the photo of him tinkering behind an XBox because he looks so much like Jason Alexander from Seinfeld. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrHoatzin Posted May 11, 2005 Oooh! Since we're talking about clothing, that old dude in that one series of comercials for that one dating service -- best suits I've ever seen. I would not mind it in the least if people peddling games and game platforms looked like dapper gangsters. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrHoatzin Posted May 11, 2005 Ha ha, don't be silly! There's no way anyone could fit into the same room as an Xbox. HAHAHAHAHHAHA... Stupid joke, but what a delivery! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lepr Posted May 11, 2005 Old Allard: New Allard: Future Allard: Allards Heart: Man, thats just fucking wrong. Plain and Simple I'm just frightened of bald men. I'm scared of bald women. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chris Posted May 11, 2005 Plastic surgery? Shaved his head, lost weight, got in shape, took care of his skin maybe? J Allard probably has a very scary Lifestyle Manager. I don't know, he had a pretty pudgy face before. Whether it's possibly or not without plastic surgery, I think it's more likely they would have just said "Ok Allard, facelift time! You're gonna be extreme now!" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
netmonkey Posted May 11, 2005 It's possible. I used to be pudgy. And then um... my mom stopped cooking for me and I found food to be only essential to survive and not enjoy. Now I look like J Allard. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lailoken Posted May 11, 2005 ok that's not even funny... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dingo Chavez Posted May 11, 2005 Did any of you stop to think that he may have a thin, bald, Matrix loving evil brother named Gralious, who wants to destroy him to finally fulfil his diabolical machinations of world domination? Much like Microsoft. And besides, he's no Reggie Fil-Ames (I'm positive I misspelled the guy's last name) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
netmonkey Posted May 16, 2005 blogged! http://blog.sethgodin.silkblogs.com/ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Intrepid Homoludens Posted May 16, 2005 I think it's hilarious how many of us 'cynical geeks' make fun of the guy. How old are most of us? Late teens? Twenties? Enjoying breakfasts of Cheetos and room temperature Mountain Dew after staying up all night playing Halo 2 online? Ever thought of how we'll look in our late 30s or 40s? D'we think we could undergo the radical change at that age to be as fit and healthy as Allard and actually be able to wear those slim, tightly tailored clothes we would have been able to wear effortlessly when we had the body of an 18 year old but can't otherwise wear in our old age because of our guts? Especially when we're earning a six figure income and have to be in the international public spotlight representing a multimillion dollar company whose salary is mostly paid by younger versions of ourselves who enjoy breakfasts of Cheetos and room temperature Mountain Dew after staying up all night playing Halo 2 online? Just a thought. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kolzig Posted May 16, 2005 I got such genes that I just can't get fat. Never. Even if I ate all kinds of shit like pizzas everyday. Enjoying breakfasts of Cheetos and room temperature Mountain Dew after staying up all night playing Halo 2 online? I don't even know what Cheetos are, I've never tasted MD and I don't have a Xbox, so no Halo 2 for me, thanks. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Intrepid Homoludens Posted May 16, 2005 I got such genes that I just can't get fat. Never.Even if I ate all kinds of shit like pizzas everyday. Remember, though, that not being fat doesn't automatically mean being fit and healthy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marek Posted May 16, 2005 Yeah, we're all jealous. In fact, I myself seriously questioned my own coolness and manhood when I saw J Allard's pictures. Being a geek with no friends, no confidence and no success in life, I had to attack what I could never hope to achieve myself. And it worked so well! For a moment, I felt like my own inadequacies just drifted away! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrHoatzin Posted May 16, 2005 Ok, so the fat and unhip J Allard had a mid life crisis and the result is as X-tr3m3 as the letter X. The oldman to fart conversion ( => ) is ridiculous not because he decided to shed a few pounds, but because of the aesthetic that he chose to embrace after the fact. To begin with, bald white men look like freshly circumcised dicks and all the black leather and vinyl that he sheaths himself into doesn't help draw attention from the fact. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SoccerDude28 Posted May 16, 2005 When I grow up, I want to be just like J. Allard. He is my hero Also if J. Allard was black he would look like this: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
