No Ambitions, any advice?

[jmbossy]

Hey there people; I was hoping some of you may be able to help me out and that others could possibly share in my learning...

So I am fast approaching the time of my life where I need to start doing things...

The problem is that I don't really want to do anything (or think it possible to do anything I'd like to do)...
I enjoy things (Video Games, Entertainment, Books, etc) and I make due with those hobbies as pass-times; but I will eventually need to go to school or start down a path which ends with some sort of financial compensation.

I figure my problem is probably common with people my age, so to anyone in a similar dilemma, maybe we can figure something out?

Maybe you were in my position and figured something out?
Advise as you see fit internet! I command thee.

[Zeusthecat]

I recommend going to school. Some people may say it isn't for everyone but I disagree, if you can afford it that is.

 

It is amazing how stupid I used to be even when I thought I was smart. It is amazing how stupid I still am even though I've gone through great efforts to get smarter. Coming to realize the depths of my stupidity has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life.

[jmbossy]

I agree with that; I have been out of school for 1 year now and I can literally chart my regression with conversation topics. I want to continue learning, I'm just not excited or optimistic enough to spend any amount of money to do so.

[Nachimir]

Continually try new things. Volunteering for stuff is worthwhile too.

 

At the time, it felt like little of it was getting me through the existential angst, but I got through it, and so much of what I did a decade ago in some way informs what I do now.

[Twig]

I was like that once. I just kept going to school until I realized I didn't need to go to school anymore.

 

Also I'm still sorta like that, but considerably less so. Hard to get motivated for Real Shit in my own free time, but I'm sort of okay with that, 'cause I work my job pretty hard. As I type this post at work. Anyway, yeah, I don't really have any advice. School just sorta forced me to wake up, mentally speaking.

 

Although, I did have a vague goal of "wanting to make video games", which is how I chose my major (computer science). So that's a thing.

[jmbossy]

That's pretty much where I am now.
A - Make video games, but I feel i'm not talented or creative enough
B - English teacher, but I don't think with my personal philosophies I should be in any position to influence youth

 

Also, I've been in the middle of making a games journalism blog for quite some time now, but I consider that more of a hobby than anything else.

[SecretAsianMan]

I understand how you feel.  I started college wanting to make games too, but I ended up somewhere else.  Due to other factors in my life, I'm sort of stuck where I am but I still have a desire to make games.  I have several notebooks filled with ideas.

 

My advice would also probably be school if you can afford it, and keep yourself open to anything.  You may find something you really enjoy and want to do that you may not have found otherwise.  Just because you start going to school and studying one thing doesn't meant that you have to keep doing it.

[Gormongous]

I would recommend against going to grad school just because you want more school. It's not just College 2.0. Grad school is to college as a career is to an internship.

 

That said, do what you want, do what makes you happy, and taking classes or getting another bachelor's degree can be a good way to go about that.

[miffy495]

B - English teacher, but I don't think with my personal philosophies I should be in any position to influence youth

 

I just finished up my post-grad in education and am currently looking for work as an English/Elementary School teacher (am qualified for either, would prefer the latter). I've met a tonne of people who I don't think should be in a position to influence youth, but most of that is due to their pushy religious beliefs of one variety or another (to be clear: beliefs are fine, it's the pushy that bothers me). May I ask why you don't think you should be in a position of influence?

 

That said, it took five years of undergrad and a year off school to finally decide to pursue teaching, so don't feel too bad about taking your time coming to whatever decision you may.

[clyde]

The problem is that I don't really want to do anything (or think it possible to do anything I'd like to do)...

If you had enough money to get by, what would you do for 40 hours a week?

Also, we should impose a new rule. If you recommend school then you should include how much debt you are in.

[Ucantalas]

If you had enough money to get by, what would you do for 40 hours a week?

Also, we should impose a new rule. If you recommend school then you should include how much debt you are in.

Sadly, I can't seem to find a job browsing Reddit and the Idle Thumbs Forums.

Not suggesting school per se, but personally I have about $12,000 CAD in student loans left to pay off.

[Zeusthecat]

If you had enough money to get by, what would you do for 40 hours a week?

Also, we should impose a new rule. If you recommend school then you should include how much debt you are in.

I think the debt part is irrelevant unless people are recommending school in order to make money. I recommend school because I think learning in and of itself is a very rewarding experience even if it costs a shitload of money. Even though I'm still paying off debt and never use concepts like Fourier transforms in the real world I would still do it all over again in a heartbeat.

[jmbossy]

May I ask why you don't think you should be in a position of influence?

 

I'm sort of immature, talking about dicks and what not, and I am generally pessimistic regarding A LOT of sh**. I'm sort of just a kid, and I don't really want to change that fact.

As per the debt conversation

The concept of debt scares the crap out of me. My sister (now going for her doctorate at USC) has incurred more debt than I think possible for her to pay back given the best job she can probably get would be to teach (which she already does AT usc). Also my family has always been in debt, since i can remember at least; it's one of the reasons I am hesitant to go to school (My family would have to front a lot for my sake, and I would rather not have them dig deeper holes for me to end up changing my major a bunch).

My very specific fears are that I spend way too long realizing I hate major 1, go to major 2 and immediately regret it, find out I LOVE major 3, graduate and then come out the side of the system and not be able to find a job. All while incurring debt for myself and my family.

Pessimism.

 

Which brings me to why I posted this; there is nothing I love enough that I would risk all of that to pursue.

[Ben X]

That's pretty much where I am now.

A - Make video games, but I feel i'm not talented or creative enough

 

You could still learn how to code. If you need projects to practice on and can't think of any ideas, remake some old simple games. Then when you're ready to work on something new and if you still don't have any creative impulses yourself, find some creative people who can't code themselves to collaborate with. I'll bet there are plenty of them out there desperate for a coder to put their ideas in action.

[Nachimir]

A - Make video games, but I feel i'm not talented or creative enough

 

Video games or not, just keep making stuff. The best work you see out there sits on top a mountain of shit. It's not like your favourite designers and writers hibernate between doing the things they show; they have all kinds of false starts, insecurities, and unfinished projects.

[Thrik]

It seems like a good step would be figuring out something that you enjoy doing. The best jobs are the ones that are in some ways an extension of your hobbies. I spent most of my teenage years working on fan sites like Mixnmojo, gaming blogs/news sites of my own making, and a game development forum. That led to me getting good at building and designing websites, which ended up being my job for five years. That led to me becoming a more general UI developer/architect a year ago. I could feasibly go into game UI from here if I really wanted to.

 

Important things to note about my progression:

• I largely went to college so I had something to focus on while building my web design skills
• Going to college did a tremendous amount for my social life and general development as a functional human
• Most of what led to me getting a web design job I learnt outside of college
• For two years my salary was genuinely, truly shit and this is probably inescapable unless you're very lucky

 

So I guess the main point I'm getting at is this: spend a few years developing some skill that you'd love to have, whether it be producing 3D environments, programming games, or designing/engineering audio (using game examples here). Aim to do this in your free time. If you can do a course that perfectly complements that then do so, if you can do one that somewhat complements it that's cool too. It all feeds into giving you a more rounded perspective. I did a multimedia course which wasn't directly related to web design but many of the things I learnt were transferable.

[Roderick]

Roger van Oech wrote in his book A Whack on the Side of the Head, some thirty years ago, some of the key principles behind creative thinking: don't be afraid to fail, don't think it's not 'your area', don't be afraid to act the fool. Good advice. No one is born creative. In a study between a large group of people, the key difference between the people who were creative and those who weren't, was that the ones that were thought they were creative, and the ones that weren't didn't. I love I just got to use weren't didn't in a row.

 

It is good to foster ambitions, to try things out. It seems like you're already crippled by fear of making a mistake, so you're unwilling to commit to anything. That's a surefire way of ensuring you truly won't get anywhere, ever. Try stuff out, see where your passions lie, find out what you can do to make your community, or the world, a better and nicer place.

 

I feel that what you perhaps need is a whack to the side of the head. If I were in an ungenerous mood, I'd look at this topic and read 'I have a problem in my life, please solve it for me'. You complain you have no ambition, no creativity and no talent, and yet you confess to being immature and loath to change that. How about you start working at a thing you love, building up skills and feeling good about yourself - not for what you have consumed and what you've arbitrarily become, but for what you have created and chosen to be? Taking the victim role and indulging in self-pity is a dead-end street.

[clyde]

Sadly, I can't seem to find a job browsing Reddit and the Idle Thumbs Forums.

Not suggesting school per se, but personally I have about $12,000 CAD in student loans left to pay off.

My friend, never give up on your dreams. There are plenty of jobs where you can browse Reddit and Idle Thumbs all day. You just need to know how to look for them.

http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/r4prr/people_with_office_jobs_that_surf_the_web_all_day/

 

The trick is being honest with yourself about what you REALLY want instead of how your desires are symbolized. Figure out what you want to be doing and there is usually a job where you can do that.

[clyde]

I think the debt part is irrelevant unless people are recommending school in order to make money. I recommend school because I think learning in and of itself is a very rewarding experience even if it costs a shitload of money. Even though I'm still paying off debt and never use concepts like Fourier transforms in the real world I would still do it all over again in a heartbeat.

 

The debt part can be very relevant. You have to choose a job that pays you $30,000 a year even if there is something else you would rather do when you get out. Going to college to learn is like buying a boat to be a ship captain. It's possible to do it that way, but it's a very expensive and somewhat inefficient means. College has no monopoly on learning. It's a certification program. I'm sure you had some great experiences in college, but you might have had some interesting experiences by using that money to start your own business. Even if it failed, you would have highly valuable work experience. 

I went to college for two years, and I had some valuable experiences. And I like where I am now, but I could have gotten a comparable education by moving to an exciting place and reading postmodern novels while I worked odd jobs. I understand that some people go to college to learn things like medicine, law, and engineering; that is a completely different thing.

[clyde]

Richard Scarry's Busytown appears complex compared to other childrens' books, but it still simplifies occupations into caricatures. There are way more ways to make money than being a Doctor, Lawyer, Taxi driver, or Pharmacist.

Take out a pen and paper, write down a list of things you enjoy doing for extended periods of time.

Once you have a list, look for similarities and write those down in a separate column. 

For each activity you listed, write a description of what you enjoy about each of them. This is important and let me tell you why: If I write down that I like vandalizing abandoned buildings, that isn't very helpful. But if I explain that vandalizing buildings is fun because I like getting my name out there, exploring new places, I enjoy a sense of danger; then I can begin to look for paying opportunities to do those things. If I like getting my name out there, I should consider content creation or sales. If I like exploring new places then I could be an appraiser, or surveyor. If I like a sense of danger, I could be a cop, a social worker, maybe go into the Peace Corp, be a merchant marine. 
The most valuable thing you have are your enthusiasms. The things that excite you are the things you can learn quickly and they are the places where you will be seen as valuable.

[gregbrown]

I'm 26 and I still have no idea what I should be doing. Currently I'm working in lumber at a home improvement store, lol.

[Argobot]

You could always do what I did -- delay having to make any meaningful decisions by going to a foreign country and teaching English for a year. You get to travel, not worry about your future, and have people think you're doing something important when really you spend the majority of your day watching Hey Arnold! reruns in Russian.

 

Of course the downside is that eventually your visa will expire or you'll really start to miss peanut butter (Russia doesn't have peanut butter), which will force you to return to America where all your college friends have either already moved away, started grad school, or landed a dream job working with the Dept of State, while you struggle to find a full time job and rent an apartment. But after a few months of floundering, you eventually figure some stuff out, and even though you still don't have a solid plan for your future (which for a Type-A person like you is kind of terrifying), you feel pretty comfortable with where you're headed and have learned to stop comparing yourself to others.

 

Got all that?

 

(My real advice is to stop asking others for advice. No one can tell you what you should do except yourself; the sooner you realize and accept that, the easier your life will be.)

[elmuerte]

I'm sort of immature, talking about dicks and what not, and I am generally pessimistic regarding A LOT of sh**. I'm sort of just a kid, and I don't really want to change that fact.

[...]

 

Which brings me to why I posted this; there is nothing I love enough that I would risk all of that to pursue.

 

Maybe you should teach sex ed, or become a guidance counselor. Both involve dicks and being pessimistic.

 

I'm not really sure what being mature means. It's a similar vague word as "professional". I'm 31, have a good education, steady job, "own" an apartment... I guess I should be mature. But I don't feel like that all. Maybe mature is "being" boring, never making time for fun things. And if I look at people who generally would be considered mature or professional I rather see childish behavior. It's just that their behavior has more impact on others.

Being not mature enough to teach? Does that matter? I think a teacher who operates more on the level of the students will perform better in reaching the goal (i.e. motivating people to become educated in the material) than some stuffy mature teacher.

 

As for education, personally I don't have a lot of trust in diplomas. It isn't a good indication on what the person is capable off, besides being able to answer question correct enough to get a passing grade. But, the vast majority of the world sees it differently. Without a proper education you will lock yourself out for a lot of jobs. Then again, if there isn't really a lot of job demand and you are not very good and passionate, than an education can be a waste of time (and money).

 

Anyway, that's my 2ct.

 

 

Btw, I can't believe that there isn't anything you are truly interested in.

[jmbossy]

Btw, I can't believe that there isn't anything you are truly interested in.

 

   There are things I absolutely love: my short stories, video games, art, philosophy; but to spend my life dedicated to a single pursuit only to find out that there are no jobs to be found in that area scares me to death. I don't want to spend my family's money (or alternatively face massive debt) on a gamble like that. Which is why I at separate points thought "Human Resource" and "English Teacher", jobs that will always be in demand (I don't necessarily have a passion for either but they are jobs I think i'd enjoy while also being realistic aspirations).

 

   But what I've gathered from reading all of your advice is that I should take the time I have now to try and enjoy myself; and hopefully in that time develop skills which can make my far off dreams seem more realistic. Maybe like you guys I will start in one field to discover another that shares the skills I've developed. And if all else fails, Russian Hey Arnold.

 

   Thanks to everyone who took the time to share their thoughts; I hope there are other users who find this thread as helpful as I did.

[miffy495]

If you love Philosophy, I would suggest (purely from a selfish "I DID THIS" standpoint) that you start there. My bachelor's degree was philosophy, and the breadth of it exposes you to so many things (while also teaching you to argue in any of them eloquently) that odds are you'll find something else you'd like to pursue into "adulthood". It was actually tutoring logic (one of my favourite subjects through the major) that made me decide to be a teacher, as I really got into helping others through things and seeing the realization hit someone who had to that point been struggling. Three years later, I'm finishing my teaching degree at 25 and feeling like an adult, but at the same time my partner and I went out and bought a dinosaur-themed bedsheet set the other day, because fuck it, dinosaurs. You only have to grow up as much as you let yourself, and being smart and accomplished is not mutually exclusive with being "mature".