Life

[Tanukitsune]

Early thirties,why? Is age relevant to anxiety?

[elmuerte]

Maybe you should move.

[Tanukitsune]

I can't really afford to move, to our people it's normal to live with one generation minimum, it's only people in medium/high class that live alone. Heck, even married couples living with their parents are common here!

It would probably shame my family and make them seem like the weakling who ran away, although if things get bad enough, I might actually consider it.

[Roderick]

I sympathize with you, Tanu.

Your age is of interest to us because most of us would agree that if you're early thirties, your parents should not have the licence to bully you into any of this. You are a goddamn adult and you can spend your money the way you like it. But this might be Spanish culture, I guess? Perhaps it is time to fly out from under your parents' wings. Don't worry too much about the anxiety attacks. They seem to come from the pressure your parents are putting on you and they make you feel helpless and like a child. If you get more independent, you might find the strength you need and not have the attacks.

Also, it's complete bullshit to expect someone to find a job within a week. What the fuck?

[Tanukitsune]

The week to find a job was the most bizarre part, maybe I'm just terrible at finding jobs, but I was simply resorting to grabbing a product, googling it and sending my CV to the people who worked on it and spending a few hours a day until I simply ran out or ideas...

Do you remember when you were a kid and studied hard and then took a break and that's the exact moment you parents check on you and the obviously assume you've been goofing off all day? That's how I felt all week, I guess they thought I wasn't been serious enough because I wasn't sending CVs 24/7.

I know I should move out, my stress would probably go away much quicker, but according to our ways (or maybe just our families' way) I can't leave them before I get a job.

Heck, I'm willing to work in the septic tank sector, I just can't seem to find any jobs, I only see white collar jobs for which I'm under qualified or scam jobs like telemarketing.

Would it be too weird to get the yellow pages and look company by company and send them CVs? I would have asked the building's cleaning lady where she works and send my CV there, but I guess she doesn't work Saturday's

[Irishjohn]

I don't think it would be weird, just be ready for the vast majority of people to never bother getting in touch. I definitely don't think it would hurt though, and if anything came of it you would suddenly have options, at least.

[Roderick]

I assume you're still living under the same roof with your parents? It's time to distance yourself from them, if you feel boxed in. To hell with those traditions, you need to stand up for yourself. You don't need to rush to find some awful job, just negotiate with your parents. Draw the line and tell them that they can't force you to use your own money to do anything. Tell them you are willing to play ball, but they can't enforce anything.

And if they threaten to throw you out, that might be a blessing in disguise. If you have enough money saved to by an entire convenience store, then you have enough money to live for a few years on your own without working.

But before it comes to that--negotiate, draw a line, communicate. You are an adult.

[James]

I'm not really equipped to give particularly involved advice, but have you ever tried finding a job through an agency? Don't give up on directly contacting companies, but it's an agency's job to find you a job, so you might have some joy with that. It's how pretty much everyone at the company I work for was hired, including myself.

[Tanukitsune]

If I had enough money to buy a business I would have bought one, apparently in this market place you only have to pay rent to the market owner, at least that's what it seemed like from the conversation they had in front of me.

I think my main problem is that I'm more suited for blue collar work and the internet is good to find while collar ones, the only factory job offer I managed to find online was a Coca-Cola factory.

[Tanukitsune]

I'm not really equipped to give particularly involved advice, but have you ever tried finding a job through an agency? Don't give up on directly contacting companies, but it's an agency's job to find you a job, so you might have some joy with that. It's how pretty much everyone at the company I work for was hired, including myself.

I've heard of temp job agencies, which kinda suck, is there such a place that actually helps you find something more permanent?

[elmuerte]

In any case, a week is ridiculously short to find a job. Even a sure things takes more than a week. I've only had the reverse (company contacting me to offer me a job) and the shortest time to seal the deal was 2 week, and that was with the university where I was about to receive my masters degree.

If you were a descent Java software developer, and willing to move to the Netherlands, I might have been able to get you close to a job.

[Thyroid]

I'm off to Lisbon in a few hours. I always thought that anyone who got on a plane on the tenth anniversary of 9/11 must be a dunce, and look at me now.

Anyway, that fun thought aside, anyone know anything particularly cool to do in Lisbon?

[Nappi]

I went to Lisbon a few years ago but it I can't seem to remember anything specific about it. Some modern arts museum had a collection of jewelry that depicted some weird science fiction fusion of people and insects. However, it's safe to say that exhibition doesn't exist anymore.

Glad to be of help.

[James]

I've heard of temp job agencies, which kinda suck, is there such a place that actually helps you find something more permanent?

They mainly focus on temp stuff, but as I said, I got my job (which I've been at for approaching four years) through an agency. I don't think they're different institutions or anything. It's worth investigating, anyway.

In any case, you have my sympathies. I absolutely hate looking for work, which may be part of why I stuck with my job through some pretty crappy patches (it's OK now, mind).

[Tanukitsune]

Just one final question, is it a good idea to try to anything like go on job interviews before I see my therapist? Like I said before, after the anxiety attack, I feel weird and vulnerable.

I'll see in about two weeks, but then again, my parents might have already opened the store by then.

[Armchair General]

In short Tanu, you are early thirties, still live with your Mum and Dad, are currently unemployed, heavily into computer games and suffer with anxiety attacks.

Perhaps, your parents are trying to gently nudge you into the world, in an attempt to bring you out of your shell? After all, they will be close by the place you work, will no doubt help you out a little financially if and when you need it and probably want you to make a little more of yourself (in their eyes) under their close supervision.

They may have only given you a week to find a job as a token gesture because perhaps they have heard you say that before and sort of 'knew' that you wouldn't get a job in the end anyway?

I don't know as it's difficult to gauge correctly given the scant information you have posted on here, but perhaps..perhaps...you should see this as a good thing?

It sounds like your parents love you and want to help you spread your wings and mature a little.

[elmuerte]

Remember how I though my old workstation was dieing because it sometimes was making whistle sounds? Well... the sound comes from my UPS. So I bought a new workstation for nothing. Or at least, there wasn't a real rush to replace the 3.5 year old system. Ah well... DXHR at least loads much faster now.

[Tanukitsune]

I am not unemployed, and I live the in the kind of country were living with the parents isn't a social stigma, yes, I am aware my parents care for me and want the best for me, but like I said before, they want me to invest my live savings in an aging market that will be a ghost town in 5-10 years.

Scant information? You must have missed a post because my first post was very much TL,DR territory.

To summarize, I think I am capable of getting a job or even running a business, I just think their idea is dreadful, my parents won't listen and are carrying on, and I'm getting worried sick over me and my family, I've had my first anxiety even and I've lost almost 20 pounds due to stress in the last few weeks.

The main reason I know opening the store in this market is a bad idea is because I work in the same aisle and it's practically a ghost town already!

Who knows, maybe the business won't be that big of a disaster, but my main concern in my stress and anxiety levels, which seems to be worrying to everybody BUT my family.

ElMuerte, I almost had a similar experience to yours, except I found the cause before replacing my computer.

One day, I started to smell plastic burning and I immediately thought it was my PC, the smell went before I could pinpoint where it was coming from, and since I didn't have any overheating warnings or performance issues I forgot about it.

I happened again, and again... Until one day I realized that it seemed to happen at a certain time and that it was coming from outside, it turns out it was just the smell of cigar ash burning the plastic of my AC outside. But since that is still dangerous, we complained to the upstairs neighbors and they stopped.

[subbes]

Did you investigate how the whistle was being formed? Your last post made it sound like an actual air-breathing-whistle rather than an electronic whistle, and if there's any component in the UPS that can do that, I would be fascinated.

In other news, I found my fountain pen and am trying to avoid buying tens of bottles of coloured inks to use in art that isn't particularly good.

[subbes]

P.S. Nappi, you're an asshole. I like you.

[Nappi]

What the fuck?

Edit: oh.

[subbes]

THE IS THE UNIVERSAL SIGNAL OF 'KIDDING, DUDE'

Alternate explanation: It's Sunday, and I am bored, and I wanted to try and be nice to someone, but I failed

oh god this must be why no-one likes me

i blame you, moot

[Nappi]

I was just confused for a moment about what you were referring to specifically. I actually agree with you.

oh god this must be why no-one likes me

There there.. I'm sure there are plenty of other reasons, as well.

[subbes]

()

[Orv]

I'm pretty sure we're all here because we have just the right ratio of elitist gaming asshole to generally good folk. It's what makes us Thumbs.

Also the general interest in three to four men from the internet, but mostly the asshole bit.