Garple

(IGN.com)

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Wow, this feels like a blast from the past. MEMORIES!! Once there was no more 1up show, 1up yours and GFW Radio, was there even a reason to go to that site anymore? Not for me. I was a big fan and looked forward listening to/watching all that stuff every week. So sad when it just... Slowly drained. Green, Shawn Elliot, Luke Smith, Shane Bettenhausen, Garnet Lee, Mark McDonald, John Davison, Ryan Scott, Sean Molloy, Darren Gladstone, Robert Ashley and Chuff Money, yo! There were more, but these are the people I remember from that time that totally made my week, every time! That's not sad, is it? Either way, good memories and left a lasting impression!

 

I HAVE BEEN TAINTED BY NOSTALGIA!!!   :campbell:

 

The crew they had at 1up in the glory days was outstanding.

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Is it confirmed that the podcasts will disappear? 

 

I seem to remember Jeremy saying that he'd still like to do podcasts even if he has to do it separately from his new role at IGN. Hopefully that means more Retronauts. It's a real shame since it seems like Bob and Jose were just about to get Retronauts and Games Dammit back on their feet again.

 

 

 

You know, as long as we're talking about Retronauts, I feel that this is worth mentioning:

I've been listening to the old episodes, and in an early episode (would have been around November 2008, but I can't remember which one), and somebody briefly brought up Famicom horror RPG Sweet Home. They elaborated on the game's mechanic of carrying around planks and using them to cover gaps in the floor. The planks are a finite resource, break at random, and take up precious space in your exceedingly small inventory; so everyone who plays the game inevitably comes up with an elaborate and careful system of ensuring that you'll always have planks available.

What did they initially describe the game as?

They called it a boards management game.

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I would be heartbroken if Retronauts really came to an end.

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I guess re: the Retronauts thing, I should post that there's a Kickstarter for a revival of Retronauts as an independent entity from any other organization. It really flew under my radar for a while until one of my friends in the press happened to mention it -

 

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/2005831476/revive-retronauts-your-favorite-classic-gaming-pod

 

Rewards look fairly similar to what we got with the Idle Thumbs kickstarter, I'm either going to throw in just a little bit as a show of support or $50 to get that sweet T-shirt.

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It's been mentioned in another thread, i'm glad to see that people are getting behind those guys.

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"This game will impregnate your male dog with ferrets." -IGN.com

"This game will spay and neuter your new litter of dog ferrets." -IGN.com

"This game will make the state you live in reconsider it's laws against owning dog ferrets." -IGN.com

"This game will give all of your dog ferrets massive boners." -IGN.com

 

Sorry I'm really late to this party...

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So Jeremy Parish left IGN after only two months. Eesh. I'm glad that he's finally got a chance to have his honeymoon, at least. And it sounds like he's got some really big plans for what he's going to be doing after that. Maybe it'll have something to do with Retronauts, since that's its own thing now.

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"Isn't this what video games are about? Doritos, Mountain Dew, late nights and trash talk?" -- IGN.com

 

"Like the cinematic masterpiece Citizen Kane ([Tony Hawk's] motion picture counterpart), every single shot is set to deep focus and delivers." -- IGN.com

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That entire paragraph of the Tony Hawk review is pretty hilarious given the graphics of the time.

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So it turns out Tony Hawk's Pro Skater was the Citizen Kane of Video games all along.

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"In the first moments of the game, Tony Hawk whispers 'Rosebud' on his deathbed. We then follow him through his harrowing journey from beautifully constructed half-pipe to mindbogglingly rusty grind rail, from painfully authentic warehouse to the haunting setting of Roswell. What is 'Rosebud"? Is it a prototype skateboard designed by Leonardo DaVinci and finally constructed by Hawk's bloodied hands? Is it the ultimate skatepark where you can grind on priceless works of art and furniture collected from all corners of the Earth? Was it simply the name of Tony Hawk's first skateboard, symbolic of Hawk's only true moments of happiness in infanthood when he pulled his first 720º? Join me in the delight of deciphering this cryptic, stunning puzzle that opens the soul of Mr. Hawk in an unparalleled gaming experience never to be equaled ever again. 9.9/10"

 

-IGN.com

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Somebody please start some kind of Play4Real style fake video game news site and refer to every single game reviewed as the Citizen Kane of games.

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Reading this made me ponder the dudebro Doritos gamer and why I cringe at the whole thing. 'Doritos, Dew, late nights and trash talk' is an accurate description of games to a massive portion of players, like popcorn and buckets of coke define cinema for many people. That's what they want. That's fine. It'd be nice if they were a bit quieter and less homophobic and sexist and loud, but that goes for massive swathes of the population. Let them make their controllers greasy and cheesy. I'm selling virtual fruit, fish and bugs to buy incremental extensions to my house from a raccoon. What the fuck do I know?

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Reading this made me ponder the dudebro Doritos gamer and why I cringe at the whole thing. 'Doritos, Dew, late nights and trash talk' is an accurate description of games to a massive portion of players, like popcorn and buckets of coke define cinema for many people. That's what they want.

 

Well, for starters, popcorn and soft drinks are generic products sold as product, rather than brands that push some kind of extreme lifestyle agenda. It's really weird and creepy to me that two very specific corporate entities -who have nothing to do with video games- have become such a fundamentally-accepted part of video games as a culture. Especially when one considers that eating greasy food (or food at all) while trying to actively play a game rather than  passively watch a movie is going to be a cumbersome and incongruous part of the experience, the whole Dew/Doritos thing only seems to exist due to being aggressively pushed on an audience.

 

It'd be nice if they were a bit quieter and less homophobic and sexist and loud, but that goes for massive swathes of the population.

 

And this is an even weirder and creepier level of resignation to me. What happens if someone at a cinema starts yelling racial slurs at the characters, or if an athlete makes a homophobic statement, or an actor does something horribly sexist? Generally they get punished for it. If any of those things happen on Xbox Live, it just means your headset is working correctly.

It's just such a fucking bizarre thing to go "oh, well if I enjoy video games I must also accept all of this horrible shit."

 

 

 

 

Incidentally; gaming is watermelon, carbonated lemonade, and playing Dreamcast games with friends on late summer afternoons.

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Well, for starters, popcorn and soft drinks are generic products sold as product, rather than brands that push some kind of extreme lifestyle agenda. It's really weird and creepy to me that two very specific corporate entities -who have nothing to do with video games- have become such a fundamentally-accepted part of video games as a culture. Especially when one considers that eating greasy food (or food at all) while trying to actively play a game rather than  passively watch a movie is going to be a cumbersome and incongruous part of the experience, the whole Dew/Doritos thing only seems to exist due to being aggressively pushed on an audience.

 

 

Incidentally; gaming is watermelon, carbonated lemonade, and playing Dreamcast games with friends on late summer afternoons.

 

 

Very unfortunately, there are plenty of products that are marketed as the official product of (unrelated activity). Have you seen the Bud Light/Ultra/Select/64 commercials? It's the sport beer for people who blood dope and run ultra marathons like Lance Armstrong! But for sports!

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I don't think the brand/product distinction is important - whether it's Dew and Doritos, or Pepsi and Pringles makes little difference. Whatever brands are used, it's all empty sugar and calories.

 

And this is an even weirder and creepier level of resignation to me. What happens if someone at a cinema starts yelling racial slurs at the characters, or if an athlete makes a homophobic statement, or an actor does something horribly sexist? Generally they get punished for it. If any of those things happen on Xbox Live, it just means your headset is working correctly.

It's just such a fucking bizarre thing to go "oh, well if I enjoy video games I must also accept all of this horrible shit."

 

Incidentally; gaming is watermelon, carbonated lemonade, and playing Dreamcast games with friends on late summer afternoons.

 

But in a cinema I don't have the option to mute the audience. Which I can on Live. I can opt out of listening to it, just as I don't have to read IGN. Browsing almost any public forum on the internet is enough to make you despair but we're not forced to, and it doesn't mean EVERY person who washes their nachos down with Dew while fragging noobs is a reprehensible human being. My own kneejerk judgement of that stereotype is to sneer but that's so easy. We don't look down on 'popcorn' moviegoers with the same disdain as we do Dewdbro 'gamers', and maybe that's unfair.

 

Live is a horrible place to be with a headset on and MS should do something about it. Until then I'll block out the negative and concentrate on the positive, just like everything else. I wouldn't say I'm accepting the horrible shit to enjoy video games any more than I accept the horrible shit going on around the world in order to enjoy living in it.

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Incidentally; gaming is watermelon, carbonated lemonade, and playing Dreamcast games with friends on late summer afternoons.

Video games = playing Dreamcast. A sentiment we can all get behind.

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I'm not fond of broadly throwing X-box Live under the bus. I've probably spent more time on Live than just about anybody else here, and it's really such an issue of specific crowds on specific games, and i think it's the same everywhere. It's not just a matter endemic to that one service.
 

That, of course, doesn't ease the sting if the game you want to play has a shitty community, and that's why Live has party chat. Play with people you like. (I've played entirely too much Halo, and enough public games to believe that its community is pretty okay for the most part, but i still prefer setting up a private party chat for a group of my own friends when doing matchmaking.)

I do hate, hate, hate how much Microsoft encourages the dudebro culture in its advertising, though i think Activision is the most guilty of it, concerning any of the major publishers.

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