Hitman: Absolution

[mikemariano]

I wanted it, so I drew it:

[miffy495]

Man, I'm sure we could start an online petition to try to get them to make this game. At least as a bonus level? Facebook marketing mini-game? Something? Damn your awesome imagination, Mike!

[Brannigan]

I wanted it, so I drew it:

Now I just need an image of that and max ides in his tugboat sailing off into the sunset.

[toblix]

There is a gameplay trailer here. It looks exactly like one would expect a 2012 AAA Hitman sequel to look. Not very exciting stuff, but who knows – it might turn out awesome.

Fun fact: For the game's music, they replayed Jesper Kyd with two guys called, wait for it, Peter Kyed and Peter Peter.

[Gwardinen]

I don't think that link is right, unless IO are going SUPER abstract and artistic with their "trailers".

[njoos]

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uh

[vimes]

Thank you Sucker Punch and thank you IO Interactive.

[Jaraknarn]

Wait, so they were dressed as Nuns exclusively so they could pull off their habits to reveal S & M gear?

(Buzzkillington Nose bridge rub and sigh……)

[mikemariano]

uh

Yeah but it's OK because after he kills them, Agent 47 takes their clothes and dresses up like a fetish nun.

[pabosher]

Well, I do have a boner now, so I guess that's a thing.

[Nappi]

Spiritual successor to Brütal Legend.

[Jaraknarn]

Well, I do have a boner now, so I guess that's a thing.

Well duh. We all got boners, I just ASSUMED that we were going to talk around the boner…… aw crap, now I've got another one…

…

[Hermie]

I didn't get a boner until Hit Man started strangling the gunnuns.

[Chris]

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uh

Well that sure was the absolute stupidest thing I've seen in quite a while.

[pabosher]

But weren't you EROTICALLY AROUSED and therefore MORE LIKELY to buy the eventual VIDEO GAME?

[Jaraknarn]

I for one have certainly started to associate this game with SEXUAL AROUSAL.

The Giantbombcast made a good point on this, if they made a truely representative trailer or gameplay trailer for a hitman game, it would be 2 hours long, 20 minutes of which would be quick load screens and guard patrol route mapping.

Its a stealth game, were already invested, this trailer is for the guy who only buys games that look like Call of Duty.

[Chris]

I for one have certainly started to associate this game with SEXUAL AROUSAL.

The Giantbombcast made a good point on this, if they made a truely representative trailer or gameplay trailer for a hitman game, it would be 2 hours long, 20 minutes of which would be quick load screens and guard patrol route mapping.

Its a stealth game, were already invested, this trailer is for the guy who only buys games that look like Call of Duty.

A game is not just its mechanics. Both in content and tone, this trailer is offensively idiotic. Nothing about it has anything to do with what a good Hitman game is like. It also looks absolutely nothing like Call of Duty. I'm not much of a Call of Duty fan, but you'd STILL never see something this blatantly absurd and stupid in a Call of Duty trailer. If nothing else, a Call of Duty game at least attempts to simulate realism--or convey the illusion or tone of it with the window dressing, anyway--whereas this is just 100% contrived nonsense.

[njoos]

Its a stealth game, were already invested, this trailer is for the guy who only buys games that look like Call of Duty.

This is the problem with this trailer, and the countless of game trailers like it. It is trying to sell a game to people who doesn't like Hitman games, while the people who actually like Hitman games are going "What in the hell. Guess I'm not buying this Hitman game after all".

[Hermie]

[toblix]

Didn't Deus Ex: Human Revolution also have a S&M nun trailer? That turned out fine.

[youmeyou]

No, it had a Rihanna music video disguised as a boss fight.

[syntheticgerbil]

Besides the rampant stupidity and band of sexy killer nuns stuff, I was actually watching that video and trying to figure out if hitting the women in the nose and getting them all bloody was part of the sexy fetishism or if it was just the Hitman doing his usual fights and he just happened to be hitting them in the face.

[Twig]

I dunno what you guys are talking about this trailer is great I especially like the part where guns get hit by water.

[Jaraknarn]

No, it had a Rihanna music video disguised as a boss fight.

Haha, funniest yet, congratulations.

A game is not just its mechanics. Both in content and tone, this trailer is offensively idiotic. Nothing about it has anything to do with what a good Hitman game is like. It also looks absolutely nothing like Call of Duty. I'm not much of a Call of Duty fan, but you'd STILL never see something this blatantly absurd and stupid in a Call of Duty trailer. If nothing else, a Call of Duty game at least attempts to simulate realism--or convey the illusion or tone of it with the window dressing, anyway--whereas this is just 100% contrived nonsense.

Chris, that was mostly a jokey comment, I'm not defending this video, just offering a potential empathetic reasoning behind it. I was under the impression that some of the appeal of the series is the silly disguises¿

I would argue that it has at least partial content links to what my impressions of the game were, he doesn't charge out of the fire gunss assault rifle blazing, there's at least some service given to the way that most people played this game, with a garott wire and pistol.

Once again, I'm not defending this crass awful thing, I'm just saying, I've never seen a stealthgame yet that had a good representative trailer that made me more excited for the game. Video game marketers just don't know how to make them, Deus Ex didn't even come close, but I freaking loved that game.

[Chris]

Haha, funniest yet, congratulations.

Chris, that was mostly a jokey comment, I'm not defending this video, just offering a potential empathetic reasoning behind it. I was under the impression that some of the appeal of the series is the silly disguises¿

I would argue that it has at least partial content links to what my impressions of the game were, he doesn't charge out of the fire gunss assault rifle blazing, there's at least some service given to the way that most people played this game, with a garott wire and pistol.

Once again, I'm not defending this crass awful thing, I'm just saying, I've never seen a stealthgame yet that had a good representative trailer that made me more excited for the game. Video game marketers just don't know how to make them, Deus Ex didn't even come close, but I freaking loved that game.

I take your point, but I still don't think that just because situation A features a trailer that doesn't represent game X, and situation B features a trailer that doesn't represent game Y, the situations are necessarily equivalent in any other way. I'm specifically referring to the tone and content of the trailer; expectations for gameplay are a different matter.