dartmonkey

Yerp, just pre-ordered PSN version (broken disk-drive means download only for me). Us greasy Europeans have to wait until FRIDAY for the pleasure of death. Or, more accurately, I'll be waiting until October for the bastard thing to download. Anyone know if the PS4 takes so long to download stuff?

This thread is for video game mechanics and tropes that have run their course and need decommissioning. State your subject, give some examples and reasoning for their retirement, but also suggest some possible replacements/alternatives.They can be large or small but your proposal should be mechanical rather than thematic or generic ('space marines' and 'all cover-based shooters' don't count). I'll kick it off with Search & Loot I'm willing to admit that perhaps I bring this on myself. I'm one of those people who has to systematically scour every room for items before moving on, and in a Run'n'Gun cinematic FPS perhaps I'm just playing it wrong. But in strong narrative games like BioShock Infinite and The Last of Us I think I'm in the majority. We don't want to miss a single scrap of paper or audiotape. And that means searching every last inch to find pills, ammo, money, lockpicks, medallions, dogtags, badges, diaries, comics... I'm getting to old for this shit. My experience of both the above examples was seriously dampened (and lengthened) by my compulsion to grind up against every surface hoovering doohickeys. And not just random collectibles but items necessary to uncover a deeper narrative. The Last of Us was so intricately detailed it took ages just to find the little triangle that may or may not materialise over a cupboard handle. But. I. Couldn't. Stop. My solution is crap, but it's got to the point where I would find it preferable - at the threshold of every room have an option to 'Search Environment'. *box pops up* 'You found some tape, $14 and a March 1987 copy of Penthouse.' Or why couldn't I give Ellie instructions to just search everywhere we go? That doesn't break the 'illusion' and keeps it optional. I'm so tired of being a fucking Dyson for half the game.

Thinking I might jump onboard with 2. I completely missed the first one as it sounded too much like self-flagellation, but this feels exciting and I can't remember the last game I bought at launch. Skyward Sword maybe? Question: My PC would run this, though it's getting on a bit. I've also got a PS3, though the disc drive is broken. So my choices are: 1. Wait 6 weeks for the PC version with 360 pad. 2. Spend a weekend downloading the PSN version and play it on the telly with a Dual Shock 3. A common problem, but opinions? Buying both versions at full-whack really isn't an option.

Buzz Lightyear Laser Blast (PAL) Beat this game on Saturday. Played with fiancee who insisted the hardware was faulty. She still beat the game though - think it's aimed at the casual crowd. It froze a couple of times, something to do with wheelchair access? I took advantage by repeatedly zapping Zurg on the underside of his gun. Finished up as a Lv4 Space Scout, 182,000 points. Standard on-rails shooter. 3D is great. Tight controls, 360 degree movement feels fluid but reticule is too small. Needs iron sights. 5/10.

Tapping A to pry open grilles. Groan. I get it, it's a task which requires effort, but come on Bats! There's dozens of these things. Twirling the analogues to unscrew bolts would feel better somehow.

For a long time I've thought that what games really lack are 'post-endgames'. Last acts are difficult, and it might be interesting to explore the space after the narrative, especially in hybrid RPG/action/adventure games. It would give the player some time to digest the finale and enjoy the fruits of their labour. I'm going to do something hugely pompous now and quote myself: More than once I’ve finished a great game and felt a little empty. Not because it was deficient in any way or the ending was unsatisfying, but because for all my efforts I don’t get to enjoy the peace I’ve brought about. After hours spent liberating the world, I rarely get to kick back and enjoy it. Having watched the credits I’m invariably returned to the File Select screen and the game forgets I’ve already won. Hyrule is forever in a state of impending doom that I am powerless to affect no matter how many times I thrash Ganon. Imagine defeating him and riding into town a hero, being offered the key to the city and basking in the glory a little bit. Imagine taking Zelda for a picnic or playing with the kids in Kokiri Forest. Imagine having new ways to enjoy the places I’ve saved. Okami gave me such an opportunity when I returned triumphant to Kamiki Village for the festival. Fireworks exploded and the jubilant music heralded my victory like the end of Return of the Jedi. It was short-lived, of course, for I was only halfway through the game, but it felt so unusual and fulfilling to see the results of my questing and enjoy some kind of respite. Developers invest so much in building these worlds they should explore the possibilities of expanding your experience meaningfully beyond the endgame. I can’t be the only player to feel deflated when all my heroism results only in New Game+. Obviously, this only applies to a certain type of game. It would be interesting to use skills and tools I've obtained in new non-violent contexts after the battle is over. Rebuilding, farming, hunting, I don't know. I've heard that the Last of Us DLC does something like this (eg. repurposing game mechanics in new contexts), though I haven't played it yet.

Fez, Beatbuddy and Starseed Pilgrim have just been added to Humble Bundle 11, but I've already got Fez from number 9. Let me know if you'd like it and I'll PM the URL.

Sorry subbes, I kind of barged in with my Harold Ramis post without reading yours. Seems like a crappy situation - if you confronted him he would likely play the 'it was the drink talking' card. Which translates as 'I'm a twat when I drink'. Which translates as 'I'm a twat'.

Just woken up and read about Harold Ramis. I'm actually tearful, which is perhaps because I'm turning into a nostalgic nightmare, but probably because Ghostbusters was a huge part of childhood and he seemed like the nicest, most talented and humble gent imaginable. So, campers, rise and shine. And don't forget your booties 'cause it's cold out there today. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nt4JXKUv5MQ

I played a few minutes of Assassin's Creed 1 and 2, I think it was a bit of Jerusalem and Venice. It was interesting, but there's no way I'm diving into that franchise now. Maybe I'll try the reboot. Zelda is interesting. What about it makes you feel indifferent? The faux-medieval fairy setting could turn people off, but my guilt would be through the roof if I'd never played one. I've only recently played through LttP and found it disappointing. In fact, 16-bit Nintendo is, for me, an underwhelming area. The 'seminal' games - Super Mario World, Yoshi's Island, Mario Kart, LttP, - leave me feeling a little empty. I had a Mega Drive and missed the SNES boat, and now it's all been iterated to the nth degree. I got a good way through and was grinding the hell out of it. Really felt obliged to finish until one day I reached the 'fuck it' stage and traded. I felt my time was being rewarded with tired tropes and little else. Simply wasn't worth the investment.

Final Fantasy doesn't qualify for me because I feel like there's something buried in the good ones that I might enjoy. I also played 4 on DS, which didn't grab me. JRPGs in general go on my guilt list but I'm resigned to the fact that I'll probably never have the time. The only pattern I can note so far is a slight Sony bent. The ones I can think of lack personality and feel like token nods to genre gaps in their portfolio. I have genuine 'old man brainfart syndrome' when it comes to separating Killzone from Resistance or Rachet & Clank from Jak & Daxter. Dump it on 3DS VC and I'm there! The likelihood of me playing a game decreases by several orders of magnitude if, a) it isn't fiancee-friendly (ie. it isn't Rock Band), it's not on Steam, or c) I can't play it on the bus. Edit. b + ) =

After the unveiling of the got my nostalgic juices flowing, a quick search revealed the 2009 game on Steam for 10€. I never got round to it at the time and I've just had a great few hours with it. The voice acting (Ramis and Ackroyd especially) is top notch, great writing and the devs absolutely nail the atmosphere. It's very 'Tab A, Slot B' gated gameplay, nothing spectacular, but the core ghost wrangling mechanic is nigh-on perfect. It looks great and feels authentic. If you're not into Ghostbusters, you won't miss this at all, but if that Lego set above gives you a pang of joy, you'll have a blast.

Some questions: Is this Pro-Keyboard compatible? Can I import songs from Rock Band 3? When is the White Album DLC coming?

Where's that from? I can't unsee Hugh Grant but I'm guessing it's not a Rom-Com so...

The other day I was thinking about what video game characters could best represent the Thumbs. I thought of Lord Remo as the little Spelunky dude (which was weird because not 2 days later it appeared on his stream - crazily perfect!), Famous would be some kind of DOTA lord (of which I know nothing - they've all got horns, right?) and Video Games would obviously be Mario. Breckon would be a solitary chair with a spike on it. There's only one of these that I could possibly bodge together using generic photo editing software (apart from the Breckon one, but fuck that guy). 'JVGR', pixel on GIF Really needs to be on a tiny '90s pinbadge. They still make those? EDIT. Just spent lunch going back through the thread - I had somehow missed the page with Chris' Spelunky sprites. Of course, it HAD to be Blambo! Talented chap.

Cha-CHING. Thanks for the heads-up.

I believe it's one of the Fettucinis... Incredible work all

That's the first I've heard that the controls still feel crap. That was a massive problem for me in 4 - half the time I felt like I was driving the character. Everything I've seen written says how improved it is but it seems there's a long way still to go. This assuages my GTA 'guilt' DaveC and Griddle described. Maybe guilt isn't the right word. It's more of a desire to ride with the wave. Sure I can still play it in years to come, but playing with others and understanding all the tweets and allusions and news stories etc adds another dimension to the experience. If I'm going to play something, there's no time like launch. On a side note, does Red Dead have the same control issues? On topic, Surgeon Simulator. 74 minutes and a few bird-flipping achievements later, I still can't do a damn thing. The wrist angle is my biggest problem - I might have a chance if it was mapped to the scroll wheel. Hard.

Have been trying to plough through a few of the backlog. I tried Surgeon Simulator but there's no way I'm ever completing that. Not even a heart transplant. It took my 19 minutes to get the Team Fortress tape in the VCR. However, I have finished Hotline Miami and Steamworld Dig on PC and 3DS respectively. Hotline took a while to get into but was a grower. My play style was all about the melee and the audio feedback made it 'feel' incredible. Enjoying the violence implicated you in the narrative. I'd heard great things about Steamworld and thought it might scratch the Spelunky itch. Unfortunately I think it's more of a gateway drug. It was thoroughly enjoyable digging up precious stones for a few hours and the progression was fine, but it started to drag towards the end and didn't offer much else. I'm still resisting Spelunky - it would require too many hours tied to a PC. A 3DS version could hook me though. The Mega Drive version was my first ever game, but I never played the MS version. I thought this and Power of Illusion might result in VC releases for Castle/World of Illusion but nadda so far. I'm waiting for a sale to pick this up - I'm eager to hear what Grant Kirkhope has done with the soundtrack.

I feel that most dialogue is avoidable. Video games have all of film's advantages of showing rather than telling, plus they can generally afford more subtlety because the player has more time to explore a given environment. A tossed cigarette pack or a charred corpse conveys information more effectively than an NPC saying 'he was a 20-a-day guy' or 'beware the dragon!' But if the writer has no power over these elements and has been asked to work them into the dialogue, even the best will struggle to crowbar in info they would rather jettison or communicate differently given free reign. Seconded. I quite fancy going back and playing it with the modded ending that came out last year(?) reinstating the 'proper' ending.

I've been playing around in Game Maker and have got a little pixel dude walking around with a 3 frame walk animation. It's clear that to progress much further I'm going to need gml so I printed out a guide last week. Long way to go, but it's great to see others around doing similar things.

Some strange/interesting ideas from Iwata at the investor meeting, though it's all a bit vague and doesn't sound appealing if you're not a soccermom. He'll need to clarify his definition of 'non-wearable technology' - as I understand it, I've got piles of that shit all round the house. The QoL Iwatacareware sounds very Wii Fitty although he said it goes beyond that. Some kind of biometric tablet? Regardless, he's chasing your mum again. I can't see third-parties and indies jumping on a treadmill with them, so no help there. So Wii U officially dons the Gamecube crown and accepts the Great First-Party Trickle. If I were in Iwata's position, I'd be pimping Pikachu and co. with NFC like there was no tomorrow, but hey. I've read several pieces that have suggested the key to sales is ditching the tablet but I simply don't see how this would work. The Gamepad (and therefore the console) needs games that make it indispensably fun, but for whatever reason they just haven't arrived. You'd have thought the console was designed around one core concept to demo the potential. Maybe they thought Nintendoland was it. Right now, the off-TV play is the only thing selling it, besides a few teases from Nintendoland and ZombiU. BUT, sack the Gamepad and what have you got? How do you sell THAT box? The Gamepad stays. But without a balls-out system-selling phenomenon (which Mario Kart is not), that price has to come down. Edit. Oh, and DS games on Wii U is a nice extra, but Mum's still got her DS Lite for Brain Age. Why would she want to play it on a bigger, heavier thing that only works in the living room and has half the battery life?

Ergh, Bureaucratic Filler. Though that spills out into a much murkier area of gating and missions. You need X. Y has X. Y has beef with Z. Eliminate Z to get X from Y. I groaned so much when Tess and Joel needed weapons from Marlene. Any sane homocidal video game dude would just butcher Y to get X. Fuck Z. That's the time to crack out the 5 star system. I'm in two minds. Part of me enjoys a cleverly contextual tutorial. The other part likes the honesty of the explicit. For some reason I've got Zelda tutorials stuck in my head and they've been getting steadily worse since Ocarina. God help me if I have to Z-target another tree stump.

http://www.youtube.com/embed/BF0EaH73ee4 Video comparing E3 demo AI to final AI.

But we're all in the BioShock universe now. Innit.