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April 28, 2016 Our descent into Dark Souls 3 continues, but we started over with a brand new guy. This new guy is less lucky than the old one, but otherwise actually equipped to fight the charge guys, tree guys, ice guys, bendy guys, etc, that he encounters. He's still working on remembering their names. Meanwhile, in an Italian villa, Agent 47 visits a Spirit Halloween Store, tries on some cellophane-wrapped "Charge Guy," "Tree Guy," "Ice Guy," and "Bendy Guy" costumes, and is unimpressed.
Discussed: Hitman (2016), Dark Souls 3, Facebook Messenger, Dark Souls
April 21, 2016 You roll the sausage along the ground. In the far distance, lumbering beasts wage ancient battles, and a naked multicultural society roams the prehistoric plains. You roll the sausage on to a grill, and it acquires a satisfying char. Beyond the horizon, teams of highly-armed warriors fight lightning-quick pitched battles and acquire ever more advantanced technology. You drop the sausage into the ocean. Crap. Isn't something supposed to, like, happen?
Games Discussed: Dark Souls III, Doom (2016), Overwatch, Team Fortress 2, Stephen's Sausage Roll, Rust, Resident Evil, The Legend of Zelda
April 14, 2016 It's game time. You're confident. You know this. You load up Dark Souls 3. You have some trouble with the menus, but it's alright, you figure it out. Forty minutes later, something on the screen almost resembles a human face. Enter the game—it's brutal, not what you remembered. As your grotesquely-faced wizard is wrecked beyond belief time and again, you reflect on how one can feel so old and yet like such a baby. You load Super Hypercube and watch a small cube slowly and satisfyingly descend into an appropriate receptacle. You make a drink on the rocks.
Discussed: Dark Souls 3, Hyper Light Drifter, Enter the Gungeon, Tales of the Arabian Nights, Super Hypercube, The Foo Show, EVE Online, NBA 2K16
April 6, 2016 Outer space is burning, ravaged by the never-ending military-corporate conflict factory that is EVE Online. While reports are still coming in from deep space, we can confirm that just like real wars, Spacemonkey's Alliance is involved, as is Killah Bee, 1ronBank, and the Moneybadgers. If this is all too much for you, know that IKEA has released a piece of VR software that lets you chill out in a perfectly clean, virtual kitchen forever.
Discussed: EVE Online, IKEA VR Experience, Hyper Light Drifter, Hitman (2016), Bombmeister, NBA 2K16
March 30, 2016 It is 2017. The stench of scorched mozzarella stings your nostrils. Brand warfare has emerged as the dominant vector of economic and military conflict. A delivery bot rolls your way, and you frantically dig a receipt out of your pocket, showing a recent order for a medium half-sausage, half-pepperoni. Too late, you realize your mistake: this is a Taco Bell bot. "Okay, I will destroy humans," it offers cheerfully, then everything goes black.
Discussed: Hitman (2016), Sumer, Microsoft Tay, Domino's Pizza, Robot News
March 24, 2016 There's something strange about the person facing you—as though their face isn't quite their own. Strange. Everything seemed fine when you were talking online about resource management games and the new Hitman. They even had some great tips to deal with your rodent infestation. But now something seems off. You confidently offer a handshake, but just then, they go in for the fist bump. Oh, God. It's all over now.
Discussed: Factorio, Diablo, Hitman (2016), Darkest Dungeon
March 17, 2016 This week, game developers gather in San Francisco to confer. Chris, Nick, Jake, and Steve swap stories from this year's Game Developers Conference including Super Hypercube and VR as its own medium, a look into the creation of Darkest Dungeon and finding, and adapting to your audience, and Nick Breckon's return to the NBA.
Games Discussed: Super Hypercube, Darkest Dungeon, NBA 2K16, Super Hexagon, Gorillas.bas, Tichu
March 11, 2016 We paid some of the smartest and most hardworking university-grade linguists to translate the contents of this week's episode into a language you will understand. Unfortunately they were unable to finish their work, as one was suddenly gored by an elk, the others are caught up in a cheating scandal surrounding the game of Bridge, and a randomly propagated fire seems to have engulfed the room they were using to do most of their work. We were able to save one notebook from the blaze, a notebook empty except for the phrase, "You are the One."
Games Discussed: Far Cry Primal, Far Cry 2, Stardew Valley, Crossword puzzles, Bridge, Myst, Obduction
March 3, 2016 This week we take a look at harbingers of our dark future that are not only available today, but can be controlled with an Xbox 360 controller. We dive into the final release of SUPERHOT and become sweat-soaked, tool-assisted killbots for reasons too convoluted to bother with, and chase that down with videos of a new silent robotic BigDog, and its encounter with a very agitated normal small dog.
Games Discussed: SUPERHOT, Transistor, Braid, Doug Dug, NBA 2K16, Spaceteam (Card Game)
February 25, 2016 Boston Dynamics has upped its robot game, advancing the state of cybernetics ever further. Meanwhile, all we've been doing is playing some video games. So grab your hockey stick, your basketball, and your devil dagger, because the clock is counting down, the future of humanity is on the line, and all eyes are on you. It's time to bust a signature move. Featuring James Spafford as Jake Rodkin, and Robot Jake Rodkin as Jake Rodkin's introductory spiel.
Games Discussed: Devil Daggers, XCOM 2, NBA 2K16, Overcooked, Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes, Spaceteam (card game), Lovers in a Dangerous Spacetime
February 18, 2016 This week we dream of success in the face of almost certain failure. Of reaching out and, just for a second, really feeling like you've achieved something. A soldier in XCOM 2 lasts long enough to top the squad leaderboard, long enough to earn a permanent seat on the transport ship, long enough that we recognize her trademark smirk, but no longer. In NBA 2K16, a five foot eleven kid gets drafted out of high school, makes his family proud, and even plays in a few games, before his teammates conspire against him and sink his career. A video game podcast produces 250 episodes over eight years.
Games Discussed: XCOM 2, NBA 2K16, hard games
February 11, 2016 Today's the day. Today you can play all those games you've been eyeing but didn't feel you had the time. Unfortunately you only have a couple spare hours, and those games are XCOM 2, Rise of the Tomb Raider, and the goddamn Witness. This week we scratch the surface of some great games, and share our impressions with you. Welcome to the half-take special.
Games Discussed: Rise of the Tomb Raider, The Goddamned Witness, XCOM 2
February 4, 2016 Happy birthday to you. We're getting really into The Witness, and we've kept it spoiler-free. Happy birthday to you. Nick has also joined Chris in his Just Cause 3 devotion, and we mull over the lineage and legacy of Myst. Happy birthday to you. There's also a teddy bear that keeps singing "Happy Birthday to You." Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to—
Just Cause 3, The Witness, Myst, Riven, The Dig, ancient daddy long legs, a terrible teddy bear
January 28, 2016 Welcome, cadet. Your mission: go back in time, and kill baby Hitler. To assist you in this perilous but vital task, you will be outfitted with an array of dice, two decks of standard playing cards, a two-stroke go-kart engine, one swarm of bees, and a Carl's Jr. Western Bacon Cheeseburger. Good luck. Never give up. Never surrender. Oh, and if you see Winston Churchill, give him this teddy bear for me.
Discussed: The Witness, Return of the Obra Dinn, Tharsis, Churchill Solitaire, Sage Solitaire, Bridge, Reality on the Norm
January 21, 2016 This episode contains three documented favorite words of Nick Breckon, age 3. Mesmerized: Jake tries a Vive for the first time and briefly forgets his friends, loved ones, and the world around him. Process: Chris spends more time with Just Cause 3 and his feelings become increasingly mixed. Anxiety: As Valve opens the Half-Life and Portal universes up to the community to make and sell expansions, we fret over the future of some of our favorite games. Plus we play Oxenfree, get excited for The Witness, and fall into the surrealistic adventure that is Nick's childhood.
Games Discussed: Just Cause 3, Oxenfree, The Witness, Half-Life 2, Portal 2, HTC Vive, Myst, Super Mario Maker, Blast Corps