Thompson Posted October 1, 2010 So Jennoa and I were chatting on Steam and it got around to the topic of Episode 3 and uhhh. What follows is an unedited transcript: ....jennoa: I will agree that the best podcasts are the ones that feel like just a bunch of people sitting around and BSing about games. I had that same feeling from GFW Radio when it was around. What I did enjoy about the Irrational stuff is this: They're not really talking about the game directly. One show might be about what makes people scared. Another might be a few people from the office talking about old stories from past games. It's a very different kind of podcast, so I enjoyed how it humanized the people at Irrational. Ofcourse I don't really want every developer to do something like that. One podcast is enough Thompson: That does sound interesting, i'll check it out. Did you see Gabe Newell's response to what scares players? jennoa: No, what did he say? Thompson: "The death of their children, the loss of their powers." Thompson: Seriously. jennoa: jeez Thompson: What kind of bizarre episode 3 are they making? jennoa: I fear for my future sanity Thompson: Half-Life 2: Episode 3: SAW IV jennoa: oh god no jennoa: Half Life 2: Episode 3 Sophie's Choice Thompson: That one went over my head. jennoa: It's a movie about a haulocaust survivor who had to make a chioce between which of her childern lived or died Thompson: Sounds like a good time. jennoa: Great movie, hard as hell to watch jennoa: I'd say Half Life 2: Episode 3 The Road, but that's pretty much what Half Life is already Thompson: Again, over my head. I'm not a big movie guy. jennoa: That one's a book. Post-apocaliptic story about a father and boy waling through the runis of the world jennoa: *walking Thompson: I'm even less of a book person. Thompson: You're right about that being Half Life 2 though jennoa: All that book needed are som slug aliens and an evil doctor and valve would have a lawsuit on its hands Thompson: Also to replace the boy with a woman who is constantly swooning over the man despite the man being a killing machine who never says anything. jennoa: It's not too far off. The boy in the book is always dotting around the father. And the father pretty much has to kill everyone they meet. Thompson: haha Thompson: You know i've been thinking about episode 3 Thompson: Apart from things like Alyx dying or even you dying or both or even a portal cross over, i'm wondering if this whole weird romance thing is going to come to any sort of head Thompson: and if so Thompson: will we see the world's first first person kiss? they did the world's first first person hug. Thompson: and if so, how the hell will they do that? it would just be an extreme closs up of part of alyx's face jennoa: What they would do is this: the kiss will be seen from the reflection of a mirror, you'll see Gordon's dead serial killer eyes staring back at you through the mirror as the two kiss. Fade to black Thompson: oh shit Thompson: that's horrifying Thompson: but I don't want to see gordon jennoa: No you know what keeps Gabe Newell up at night Thompson: there's no way valve can take you out of the character jennoa: *Now Thompson: Oh I think I know what keeps Gabe up at night jennoa: Oh it won't be from third person jennoa: You'll be staring around the head of Alex at the mirror Thompson: oh, jesus Thompson: extreme head angles jennoa: yeah, if they can figure the tech out jennoa: it'll be amazing / awfu; Thompson: NVidia PRESENTS: Thompson: Kiss Tech Thompson: Featuring: Realtime head angles Thompson: It's almost as stupid as cloth physics Thompson: That can be the tagline jennoa: Sounds amazing Thompson: If Alyx dies will Gordon finally snap and fucking murder everyone? jennoa: Yes, the camera will pull back to reveal her severed head in his arms Thompson: and then he kisses it using nvidia physics jennoa: Right. On the PS3 port you'll have optional MOve support Thompson: HAHAHA Thompson: Port to XBox just for Kinect support Thompson: so you're forced to hold it jennoa: yeah, they'll ship an ALyx head peripheral Thompson: Creepy internet dudes will turn that into a sex toy in like 2 seconds flat Thompson: It's just a bad idea jennoa: ohh, didn't think of that Thompson: Unless Episode 3 goes hardcore edgy jennoa: Right, just in time for the Gordon, Alyx, and chick from Protal three way Thompson: Put it on Wii so you have to use the weird Wii controller condom thing Thompson: It would be perfect on the Wii, the name is right there Thompson: implement the horsebag somehow jennoa: For the horsebag there will be a hidden room that can only be entered if the player is sitting on the bag Thompson: Ride a strider! Thompson: Maybe ride dog, except make it a big dog just for jake. Thompson: Use the vitality sensor to detect Jake and enable secret big dog content jennoa: hahahah jennoa: Yeah, that needs to be in there Thompson: If it includes an Alyx head sex toy IGN.com can really say that it will blow you away. har har har jennoa: I just hit the hi-hat on my drums ..... You're welcome to talk about anything Episode 3 related not just.... that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jennoa Posted October 1, 2010 I'll kick things off. Will the portal make a single appearance, or will Gordon get an upgraded gravity gun that contains portal tech? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Orv Posted October 2, 2010 I'll kick things off. Will the portal make a single appearance, or will Gordon get an upgraded gravity gun that contains portal tech? The latter. The only thing that comes out of the portals will be Alyx's severed head. Fin. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ben X Posted October 2, 2010 So, what I've learnt about HL2 Ep3 is that Thompson doesn't read books or watch films. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thompson Posted October 2, 2010 So, what I've learnt about HL2 Ep3 is that Thompson doesn't read books or watch films. I hardly ever read anything but I do watch the occasional film. I don't have time for no damn reading. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mikemariano Posted October 2, 2010 Still my favorite Rock Paper Shotgun headline: Gabe Confirms Episode 3 Cancelled Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SometingStupid Posted October 3, 2010 (edited) [irony] Just played it today and completed it! Bloody awesome game! Luckily I didn't have to pay for it because I went to http://www.itsascam.com which saved me a lot of money! [/irony] Edited October 3, 2010 by SometingStupid Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
toblix Posted October 3, 2010 You forgot to open your tag. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hermie Posted October 3, 2010 You forgot to open your tag. :tup Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elmuerte Posted October 3, 2010 it's [noparse] only is without the trailing :[/noparse] Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SometingStupid Posted October 3, 2010 Was it really worthy of a ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Orv Posted October 3, 2010 Was it really worthy of a ? Considering I despise Half-Life, no, it ain't. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mikemariano Posted October 4, 2010 I do agree with this fact. Spammers! I do wonder about Valve's "three pretty big surprises" that will be revealed over the next twelve months. I am going to bet that none of them are Half-Life 2: Episode Three or anything else Gordon Freeman related. We will hear nothing about Half-Life until Fall 2011 at the earliest. Will the portal make a single appearance, or will Gordon get an upgraded gravity gun that contains portal tech? They're actually going to do a crossover with Left 4 Dead. Gordon will grow a Smoker tongue. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Drath Posted October 4, 2010 Bonus point for horse bag reference. Also, I do agree with this fact. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SometingStupid Posted October 4, 2010 Spammers!I do wonder about Valve's "three pretty big surprises" that will be revealed over the next twelve months. MineCraft? Notch said that he wanted a bigger studio and after he went holiday he said that he was going to Bellvue on a buisness trip... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mikemariano Posted October 4, 2010 MineCraft? New world-building features for Left 4 Dead 3 confirmed! Join Bill, Francis, Zoey, and Louis as they frolic with blocky, bouncy animals by day. Then it's back to good ol' zombie killing by night. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hermie Posted October 4, 2010 Spammers!I do wonder about Valve's "three pretty big surprises" that will be revealed over the next twelve months. I am going to bet that none of them are Half-Life 2: Episode Three or anything else Gordon Freeman related. We will hear nothing about Half-Life until Fall 2011 at the earliest. They're actually going to do a crossover with Left 4 Dead. Gordon will grow a Smoker tongue. I wonder, do the Steam Wallet/TF2 micro-transactions count as one, maybe two? New world-building features for Left 4 Dead 3 confirmed!Join Bill, Francis, Zoey, and Louis as they frolic with blocky, bouncy animals by day. Then it's back to good ol' zombie killing by night. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites