Phaedrus' Street Crew
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Posts posted by pabosher

  1. I called her and told her, and feel like an absolute sack of shit. I don't think she was exactly happy about it on the other end, either. Fuck. I hope you guys are right; I hope I made the right decision.


    edit: I want to cry and rewind time. I want to go to italy with her, I want to spend as much time with her as I can. Fuck.

  2. Homie, treat yo self by realizing the situation has gone somewhat fubar.


    My choice: Don't go to Italy, drop her ass and move on.

    There are waaaaaaaay too many red flags I'm catching from this person and the way things are heading or going, this shit ain't going to go well for you and everyone is going to get hurt and you'll be in pain for a while.



    I'm sorry, pabosher. I do agree with namman that the girl doesn't seem to know what she wants and a lot of the pain and confusion from that is falling on you, so it's probably better just to get clear. There's no way to control when is the last time that you see someone whom you care about, but the trip to Italy doesn't sound like it'll be very promising as a capper, given how she's been behaving when you guys have a chance to get close...



    I think this is wise. Sorry to hear about your crappy situation Speedy. That's an amazing amount of mixed messages to get and have to untangle. But I can't imagine going on a trip with someone I have feelings for that she's already said she doesn't want to go on. That's just setting everyone up to have a miserable time.

    Not sure how helpful this is, but I get the feeling from what you wrote that she actually wanted you to manoeuvre things into a relationship and is now upset because that didn't happen and is taking that out on you. Definitely someone who doesn't know her own mind. Here's hoping things work out somewhat okay at least.


    Thanks guys, I know you're right, but following through and saying 'You're right, we shouldn't go' is actually incredibly heartbreaking.


    And Osmosisch, I don't know. She's been confused the entire time she's been here. The trouble is that it's always been known that she was heading home, so this was never practical. I think that's what stopped her from allowing anything to happen (she's said as much, anyway).



    In other news, I'm seriously considering pulling a Bronstring and just going travelling for 6 weeks around SEAsia, so that could be real fun??

  3. That's a real sucky situation, pabosher. I feel for you. You got stuck in a real confusing and uncomfortable period of someone's life. It's always really tough to know (or suspect) when the last time will be to see someone you care about. 


    Thanks man, that actually means a lot. To give an update, she's thinking about whether or not we will go to Italy now, and will let me know if she thinks it can work. It hurts a lot.

  4. Christ, I've wanted to post in this thread for a while about this, but I never know the right words. Boring relationships stuff ahoy:


    So I met this girl a few months ago on Tinder. Before we met, she said that she was still settling into London and didn't want a relationship, but was looking for friends. That was fine; I'd just broken up with someone and wanted good company.


    Turns out we hit it off real easy. Our first 'date' was a five-hour coffee that was never devoid of conversation. It was great. We then continued to hang out and go places - the theatre, for drinks, to museums etc. - and one day she floats the idea of us sleeping together by me. Then she sobers up and says that that would mean getting too emotionally attached as, here's the kicker, she's leaving back to Australia in September. I already knew this fact, but felt we could have a summer love and keep it as a nice memory. She disagreed. Okay, so far so good. Then she invites me to go to Italy with her, still as friends, and I accept. We book the tickets.


    What you don't know yet, because I've not mentioned him yet, is the guy she left behind in Aus. At first it seemed like they were 'on a break' - she had a one-night stand when she got here, an experience she didn't enjoy, but felt fine doing - but as the time for her to go back gets closer, she pulls further and further away from me.


    Fast forward a little bit, past the time her friend is here and she acts like my girlfriend over the course of the night, kissing me, holding me etc. to a couple weeks ago, when I'm in Edinburgh and I get a late night call from her. She and Aus guy have def broken up, and she's sad and lonely and wishing I was there. Okay, the present distance sucks but I feel wanted, which is a nice feeling I guess.


    She comes to visit me in Edinburgh, for three nights. On the first, she asks me whether I want her to be my girlfriend for the duration of Edinburgh, and then we not go to Italy as it would be too complicated, or just be friends for both. I decide I want to see her for as long as possible before she goes, and so go for the latter. Soon after, we leave and she holds my hand on the way home and then kisses me as we enter the house. No sex, but still intimate right?


    Next day: "Did I tell you I got back with the Guy from Aus?"




    Again, fast forward a couple days and our time in Edinburgh seems stilted. She seems distant, but when she's present it's great. We get to the end of her stay, I give her a hug and she gets back on the train to London.


    Ten minutes later I get a text asking me for coffee today (Thursday) because 'she needs to talk to me' - 'it's about italy' - 'she doesn't think we should go'.


    So that's about to happen, and I fucking hate everything about this whole situation. The timing, the fact that I let myself fall for a girl who is leaving for Australia, the fact that I trusted her to not do this sort of thing and so book tickets for us to go away...


    I don't know what I'm going to do. Go there and hear her out, I guess. It's all I can do, really. I think we can go as friends - even if we are sharing a bed - because we do enjoy each other's company. Well, I enjoy hers. I know my insecurity gets to her. This whole thing is difficult. I'm going to miss her an awful lot.


    I fear that if we don't go to Italy, this will be the last time I see her. It's close enough to her departure date that that's a possibility, and if we do cancel Italy I'm not sure I could handle seeing her. I don't want this to be the last time. It's not how I want our relationship to end.



  5. if conceived on New Years have to count the full month of January so kid ends up being born Sept 1 by conventional month count - Mid September by gestational full term.  Or i could be putting my foot deeper into my mouth - lets go with that  :partyhat:


    A baby's term is 9 months, right?


    One month after Jan 1st is Feb 1st

    2 is March 1st

    3 is April 1st

    4 is May 1st

    5 is June 1st

    6 is July 1st

    7 is August 1st

    8 is September 1st

    9 is October 1st


    I'm sure I come across as a dick, but I don't mean to. These sorts of maths things always intrigue me, the way that people instinctively think about numbers.

  6. Maybe they're Jewish? Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, is September 15 this year, so October 6 would still be kind of the New Year.


    I'm reaching here.


    I think they mean the baby was *conceived* around New Years. 9 months from January is October.. :P

  7. I tend to treat them more like radio nowadays, dip in and out over the course of the podcast, especially when I'm working. The Bombcast replaced Weekend Confirmed for me, I like it but miss the production Garnett Lee did on Weekend Confirmed. That was still quite long at 2 hours though.


    Just going to dip in and say it was Dave Mabee (Del Rio) who produced all the Weekend Confirmeds - Garnett was the host. Source: was on an episode! :P

  8. I'm not letting Sony "get away" with anything, and I don't think anyone else is, either. It's just that they actually seem to care about Video Games, while Microsoft just comes off as Give Us Money Please, year after year. A lot of it is purely marketing schlock, but Sony's been ahead of the game for a while now when it comes to allowing and marketing crazy weird shit on their platform. Like what the fuck even is Dreams? Who knows but it looks fuckin' cool. (Also it's exclusive.) Horizon does look fucking great. Like a Monster Hunter that controls well. I'm interested in this Video Game.


    I'm still not seeing what makes FO4 so impressive, but then I have historically been put off by their games entirely (though I did install FO3 to give it a shot, finally, after that press conference - the intro is really, really boring).


    Congrats, Sony!


    Jeez, stop giving Sony a break Twig. They didn't have any Day of the Tentacle Special Edition news, so obviously they dropped the ball BIG TIME. I'm disappointed in you, Twig. Extremely disappointed. :tmeh:


    Fuck Sony!

  9. The most glaring flaw in that essay is that it neglects the fact that having students read texts about challenging subjects gives them a framework and a language to approach those problems with. A lot of people I know talk about race, something they've fairly recently become acutely aware of and familiar with, with the framework and language they learned from To Kill a Mockingbird, required reading in 9th grade at my school, and the Watsons Go to Birmingham, which was required reading in middle school. They came into caring about these things as an adult, but who knows if they would have been able to approach it without that earlier introduction?


    I think the real glaring flaw is that the author does not understand what they are attacking: every one of their criticisms can be placed on the backs of poor teachers and inappropriate teaching styles rather than the texts themselves.