September 7, 2017 You probably think you're pretty smart. Well, Einstein, chew on this: If a tree falls in an empty forest in an empty universe, does it make a virtual sound? Is Colonel Sanders really a powerful sorcerer? And, if so, can he bid Chuck E. Cheese robots carry out his every whim? Open your mind, and destroy all your preconceptions. They will not be reused.

Discussed: KFC virtual reality training program, Doritos bag that plays the soundtrack to Guardians of the Galaxy, Doritos bag that plays the soundtrack to The Conversation, Burger King Subservient Chicken, "Keep fucking that chicken", real magic, Chuck E. Cheese Concept Unification video, Chuck E. Cheese animatronic eradication, living robots imbued with life by a malevolent stage magician, immortal Colonel Sanders, The Giant Children's Food Brand Wars of the 1970s, ketchup, catsup (ugh), your every decision being constantly questioned, your constantly-questioning AI monitor reinforcing your stupid self-absorbed worldview, the eternal questioner Colonel Sanders ruling your consciousness, the creation of a perfect universe simulation, infinite universe recursion, dying within the machine, a tree falling in an empty forest in an empty universe, the most hubristic hoisting of all, the end of Men in Black, The Matrix 2, Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl

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Nick's Endorsement: "The Katering Show" YouTube series

Jake's Endorsement: Keeping the wiring in your entertainment center or computer desk clean with double-sided velcro and a cable zipper

Chris' Endorsement: Getting a decent point and shoot camera (I got a Canon G9X and like it), and learning a bit about how aperture, shutter speed, and ISO work to help take better photos and understand your camera

Jake's Extra Post-Chris Endorsement: Apps to help take better phone photos, like Halide for iOS

Sponsored by: Warby Parker prescription eyeglasses and sunglasses home try-on, Tales of Miir weekly fantasy saga