Dingo Chavez

They should get James Woods for their next commercial, or John Totoro. Totoro, definitely Totoro. Mr. T: Or me, fool!

You have it easy. Some of us need to wait for the PS2 version (june, people) and then make an international order that should take anywhere between 1 to 8 weeks. It's the cost of not being an american or a canadian. On a lighter note, 1up.com has just posted their well written review. The guy seems oblivious to the fact that it's mainly a platform game, but the score is good, so it's all peaches and candy. http://www.1up.com/do/reviewPage?cId=3139763 Mr. T: June, fool!

I'm fine with games that don't have a plot, hell, I love 'em. A great example is any Super Mario game (maybe not Super Mario Land, I never cared for exploding Koopa's), in each one Peach gets kidnapped by Bowser and Mario comes to the rescue, now what makes Mario so much better than anything else is the fact that the gameplay is always astute, light and amusing, the artstyle is always odd, funny and purely entertaining, and the game doesn't under any circumstances take itself too seriously. A good example for an overzealous story is Final Fantasy X or any other Final Fantasy. Sin is Tidus's father transform, at this point of the game I asked myself: why are they always trying to imitate Star Wars with a frivolous and redundant soap-oprah plot twist (which in my opinon, never worked for Star Wars, but what do I know according to the world Lucas is a bloody genius), in VIII Squall turned out to be Laguna's son, in IX Zidane is Kuja's brother, and I could also mention IV, V, VI, and VII but I won't. Don't get me wrong I love Final Fantasy VIII, IX, and X, but those type of plot twists don't work, and if they think that they do they're fooling themselves. Also Metal Gear is a fine example, but that's another book. Zelda Ocarina of Time, and Wind Waker are good examples of a stories that could be Star Wars-esque but thankfully refuse to do so. Imagine if a twist will occur with this shocking revelation: Link is Ganondorf's bastard child in a love affair with an Hylia women. Instead of choosing a predictable path in story telling Nintendo makes the plot simpler, and fill the game with humorous charactes and witty dialogue (especially The Wind Waker). I love a good story in a game, probably more than most people, but this type of stereotypical writing just boils my egg in a wrong way. Good game story telling most definitely exist, they're rare but they exist. Grim Fandango is probably the best example, Bulder's Gate 2 is another, and what about slightly forgotten games like Eternal Darkness and Soul River, and the Monkey Island series is the holy grail of witty game dialogue. Well, enough with this unneeded and verbose post. I just needed to write it, I apoplogize for any emotion scarring you may have received form this post. Mr. T: I was the original actor that played the role of Darth Vader, but that damn Lucas fired me because I insisted to end every line with the word "fool". But I have no regrets, fool!

The guy in the PianoMario video had a third arm. I'm not crazy, he had a third arm. I'm always amazed at the amount of adaptions that Nintendo themes have, I have about 60 on my hard drive in various formates. It's a part of what makes them absolute classics (along with them being some of the greatest games that ever graced our pathetic planet). Mr. T: Mario is a part of me, and always will be... fool!

I honestly thought that this plot synopsis was written by you, Kolzig, as a joke. Then I read the same thing in Gamespot, so needless to say I'm mortified, stupefied, and blutified (if that's even a word). They should be ashamed of themselves, ashamed! Mr. T: I was offered the voice role of the main character, but I turned it down. Even I thought that if I'll accept the role It'll ruin my already ruined career, actions have consequence... fool!

I hope that it's false. I hate online games. Mr. T: The internet confuses me, fool!

That was funny and educating yet historically false, Playstation ruined the Saturn yet in this movie they seem some what infatuated with each other. And what about that poor Virtual Boy, three people actually bought that thing yet it dies an heroic death. I do think that Saturn and Dreamcast make a cute couple, and that the N64 Gamecube brotherhood was an inspiration to us all. Damn that PSP, it's the new Hitler I say. Mr. T: What the hell is a PSP? fool!

I knew it was a sell-out when they decided to make Jak a "bad-ass" and started imitating GTA, which the press applauded, of course. A racing game is no surprise, no surprise at all. Mr. T: I liked Jak 2. Dingo, you fool!

As a proud member of The North American Young Marlon Brando Lookalike Association, I must mention that we are an under-funded organization and we basically offered ourselves to the mercy of EA for a certain amount of booze money. We are alcoholics, but does it make us less human? And what ever happen to that delightful chap who so aptly asked the question "Are you talking to me?" we don't see him in enough films these and if we do it's usually in cheap horror films that are funded by the man for the purpose army recruiting. I protest their foul action and ask them for a dollar. By the way, do you have a dollar? Hey Stella, give me a dollar! Mr. T says: I've been a Marlon Brandon impersonator for years now and never in my 21 years in the organization did I ever see such balderdash, fool!

I played it with my classic Sidewinder, it work rather well but I would recommend playing it with a controller that has a control stick or at least a touch sensitive pad. The camra on the other hand was rather tricky if you're playing with a gamepad, so if you want proper camra control I suggest either playing with a mouse and keyboard or better yet get the PS2 or Xbox version. It was definitely what I expected, great writing, imaginative design, tight control, and most importantly a fun game. I was also really surprised at the length of the demo, most demos these days take over 600 megs and last a whopping 10 minutes, it's good to know that Double Fine don't swing that way. I'll probably get it on the PS2. The damn thing just sits there all day, taunting me whispering my name in the foulest way imaginable "Play me" it says "You payed such a high price, why don't you touch me? I'm popular, I'm hip, so play me! play me!" It pretty much goes like that in every stinking day of my life, bloody piece of useless plastic. But at least I never bought an Xbox. Now for Mr. T: I liked it, fool!

Jake, you are a god send. Thank you. Here's Mr.T: I pity the fool who doesn't thank Jake, I do.

Just watched the Gamespot live show, I figure I'll get over the emotional scarring that it gave me in about a month. But in the end it was worth it, watching Schafer talk about the game and his life was definitely satisfying, also finally seeing Scott Cambell was nice he's a lot younger than I expected and he said "you know" and "like" about thousand times which was very odd. I wanna give Tim Schafer a hug.

I'd like to see it happen. Think about it, The Beastie Boys making mad rhymes to curse Hitler, Ice-T and Ice-Cube finally admit that they are brother and sister (I'm not saying which is which) and the adorable (adorable meaning dreadfully bad, absolutely talentless and plain idiotic, much like EA) 50-cent will lend his crazy sound to give it a more of an authentic World War II feel. It shall be pulished, then people will start getting offended then a lawsuit shall occur and EA will lose, costing them 5-billion dollars then bankruptcy, bankruptcy for EA! Mowhaha! Also, Mr. T

I hope that it's real. Just think about it, our protagonist Clippy will embark on an adventure bigger than the mightest paper trail, going through worlds such as: the dreadful HappyWood Forest that's under the tyranny of The Hippie Giant, the dysphoric Straight Avenue (has nothing to do with sexual preference) ruled by the rather euphoric Mr. Cusion and the stunningly horrid sights of Computer Domain ruled by the sagacious Laptop King on his quest to save his lovely (lovely, meaning large) girlfriend Staplie who's been kidnapped by The Paperback Writer. With voice-cast featuring: Mr. T as Clippy, Jerry Louis as Staplie and the loveable Paul McCartney as The Paperback Writer (he wrote the damn song). And Clippy 2 aptly called: Clippy 2: Revenge of The Hippies. Which revolves around Staplie being kidnapped again, but this time with a Bazooka! Mr. T says: I pitty the fool who doesn't buy Clippy's jewels!

We need to start hyping and introducing Psychonauts to the masses, people. Every time you meet a person with a massive (or slight) interest in games mention Psychonauts, here's a good way to start: let's say you're in a game store and you see a easily persuaded person who likes starting up gaming conversations (we all met some) don't just hide in a corner and hope and that he/she won't notice you, instead take the initiative and approach the person, I guarantee you that in thirty-seconds he/she (most likely he) will start a verbose chat, here's an example: The garrulous gamer: "Say buddy, what'cha buying?" You: "Psychonauts." Now, make sure that you act nonchalant, otherwise you'll blow the whole deal. Gamer: "Psychonauts? Never heard of it, what's its average review score?" He will most likely inquire this, so make sure you tell the twisted truth (or just lie). You: "Why, Psychonauts is the Mercediz of games (truth), the Zues of the entertainment world (truth), the highly respected british gaming magazine "HardCore!" gave it a perfect score, calling it "The Star Wars of games and Tim Schafer the successor to Lucas " (lie, there's no such magazine nor is Star Wars a good movie, but the person will most likely be a Star Wars fan, so try mentioning it a couple of times). Gamer: "You don't say? did it sell good." He will most likely have bad gramer and will actually care about its sales figures, sad but true. You: "I believe it sold over a million in its first week alone." It's important that you say the word "believe", it will make you sound more authentic. Now, if you're lucky the conversation will end (it probably won't), and as he goes to pay for hes copy of the new flavor of the month he'll approach the shelf that has Psychonauts and after a long pause (that will most likely last around 47 seconds) he'll grab a shiny new copy of Psychonauts. Mission accomplished. It works 78 percent of the time. Also try the same method in the workplace, the school-ground and of course in prison.

The industry is in the toilet, it just is.

Rebirth. It was a GameCube demo in 2001 by an obscured japanese CGI animation company called Mix-Core, Nintendo funded the project to show GameCube's FMV capabilities. It's basically about a tree branch that gets hit by lightening and comes to life. The demo was full of beautiful sceneries, pretty animals and a couple of stunning music tracks that really fit the ambiance of the demo. With all my hopes for the project you can imagine how disappionted I was that Nintendo never meant for it to be an actual game, instead just leaving it as an outstanding demo and leaving me the question: what if? Also: Sam & Max 2 (Bloody Lucas) and a Gamecube version of Psychonauts (it may happen... some day... I hope.) If you want to see a couple of Rebirth movies, just run a search at IGN. (I won't post a link because you got to work for it, people.) About Curse of Monkey Island, it was my first adventure game (I was around 10 or 11 at the time) and one of the absolute finest games I had the privilege of playing. I'm starting to think that some people just disliked it because Gilbert wasn't the project leader or involved in any way. I know it's your opinion, but all I have to say to you is: for shame, for shame.

1up.com has posted a new Psychonauts preview, with a bunch of Tim Schafer quotes and a new trailer (with Grim Fandangoesque music). It's a great read.