Scelerat

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About Scelerat

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  1. Had to register on the forums just so I could write about this book (don't get me wrong I've been following idle thumbs since the start and even read the forums every now and then, but I am not the kind of person that usually cares to share their opinions). I had a pretty similar initial reaction to it as some of you. I definitely judged the book by its flowery cover, but it only took a couple pages and I was hooked by the language. Never really thought of my self as very emotionally available, recognising my self in Fos Junior; the way he talked about hiding your emotions as they show what you care about. But as much as it pains me to admit, this book had me crying. I also had the same urge Alastair mentioned of having to tell my partner that I loved her, the only person in my life that is allowed to see me care (as well as you guys now, but anonymity is a wonderful thing). The old me would have scoffed at the mutual love at first sight theme of the narrative, but having lived through it (and having permanently moved countries just to be with the person I loved), I could not do anything but recognise my self and reflect. I have always been highly self reflective, but this book shined a light on matters from such angle that it just illuminated thing I have never noticed before, giving a framework to work with. Fucking hell, I can't even escape the metaphor of the light in my own thought process, I did not mean that last sentence to come out that way. I think part of the reason I had such a strong reaction to this book, is also because I haven't really read that many "proper" books, having recently very consciously ditched all sci-fi, fantasy and crime-shite in favour of books of substance, so when Opal (or was it Flash) was saying that the only reason people read books is to learn about themselves I was just nodding my head vigorously. This is also exactly why I'm following this book cast, so I'm sorry if I don't have the most interesting things to say or if I sometimes don't grasp the subtlety of the themes, but I'm new to this, When the story in the book switched to be from the point of view lightfoot, I initially didn't understand the need for it, thought that the story was pretty much complete, but the last chapters ended up being my favourites. I especially like flash's "life lessons", the fact that the past does not determine who you are and that it is up to you're future. I was also left with a feeling of having to live my own life, not quite sure what I mean by this, but just the way Ramona talked and thought about her mother. Her mother had this story and Ramona did not have any claim to it, she could respect it, but was not her's to make her own or make it suit her own version of life. This in contrast to the way Tony in the Sense of an Ending creates his own history by strategically leaving parts of his past untold, and how I sometime have a tendency to view other peoples interaction within the story that is my-life, i.e. that other peoples life stories can be altered to fit this narcissistic bio-graph where I am the centre. Not quite sure what I'm getting at, but I liked the feeling it gave me of thinking about my parents life stories as these standalone, independent things, that I should try and understand and respect, but ultimately have no bearing on me and I should leave them unmodified. The book also really made me want to read Moby Dick.