Nachimir

To an extent, I think it's about that for some people. Many designers just don't give a fuck about that at all though. I think some of it is also about game development culture rather than what games are, i.e. entire classes of people struggle to have a voice through games, and defining their output as non-games can be seen as another way of marginalising them. That's the case outside development too; I think Robert Fearon nailed it when he said the "No thanks" button on Greenlight is more of a "GET OFF MY LAWN!" button. I'm not saying all of the above is the case, and definitely not that it's a deliberate, conscious attempt by those labelling themselves as formalists to exclude others, but it's definitely very complicated and about more than what games are. In the midst of that, a bunch of people have decided to just carry on making interesting stuff and not worry about it. I think to an extent this is people arguing over the term "game" because it's the juiciest one, somewhat like academics who study emotion competing over that word and not wanting their field or what they specifically study labelled with "affect", "feeling", "mood" etc., because they're less juicy and immediately understandable terms.

Happy for you

It's hard to know without more specifics. I suppose they could interpret that in a lot of ways, and quite a few of them would indicate that maybe you wouldn't be useful in future. If the team has inertia toward making a particular game, then probably not much you could say would sway that either (None of that necessarily makes you a bad tester in general). To an extent, people can just be way oversensitive though. I was once a famously harsh tester in one mapping community, because I was a perfectionist myself and spent way to long making and tweaking projects. Most people valued my feedback; one, who asked me to test after he shat out an ugly, boxy, huge, messy, badly designed map responded with "LOL, none of that really matters" and immediately released it.

Definitely don't neglect any other options you've been focusing on. If your mom really wants to help, then she'll be willing to do it on your terms.

This is pretty much where I've ended up with it: http://twitter.com/infinite_ammo/status/324784218695680000 Edit: Or at least, the other thoughts I've had on it are nothing to do with what games are and instead about what we do with them.

I believe you. I grew up in a culty variant of Christianity and saw so many similarly fucked up situations and families while growing up. Writing about it is good for you, regardless of whether others see it. It took five years of writing stuff I never showed anyone to unfuck what they did to me. It really seems like you need non-internet allies too; I hope you find them.

Downloadable, half hour Madeon set.

Thank you for bumping this, I'd forgotten he was writing again. Michael Brough put all of those in Corrypt . This happened just after Proteus was released too. And then there's this, the sentiment of which I think is at the heart of the current formalist/zinester row, but need to think about more.

Oh god, I thought graphics vs. gameplay went away for good in 2005 It's a false dichotomy. Both matter, but not always, and each can be a thing the game is about.

Many decades ago, in the nineties, Professor Brian Cox was the keyboard player for D:Ream. Here are a load of their lyrics misattributed to him: http://imgur.com/a/D1unR

This was a lavish way to move your possessions from one flat to another, Thrik

Has anyone else played Starseed Pilgrim? It's minimal, and the audio/music is tied almost entirely to game events. I met Droqen at GDC; he's a lovely guy and this game is fascinating, but pretty hard to get into. You'll probably fail a lot without really understanding why, because it very intentionally doesn't hold your hand. The developer described it as a game about level design that's full of secrets. It's really, really well designed, and when it clicks it really clicks. I now understand it well enough that I've seen about 75% of home and am mapping the rest. I don't really want to spoil it for anyone. What held me up initially: .

I'm pretty awful at puzzle games too. I got nowhere with this first time around, but meeting the developer and hearing praise from other developers inspired me to try it again. It still took an hour of experimentation before anything really clicked, and it felt like the things I'd missed would have been obvious if I'd paid more attention, but once it does click you have… kind of a sense of freedom.

Holy moly, no wonder you've been depressed! I can't add much to what Ben said. I had an overbearing, moralistic, sexually repressive parent, and that definitely gets better with distance. I hope at some point you have the courage and support you need to be out in the non-internet world, but for now I hope you get the solace, rest and support you must need. What you've been subjected to is super harsh.

I'm trying to imagine the pitch: "It's a little bit like Vanquish, but in corridors… and with the good stuff taken out".

I keep getting a Remo too.

I've been listening to Welcome to Night Vale recently. It's tiny snippets of horror presented as community radio for a fictional desert town, and it's really funny:

There we go:

No! The way it strides along so bouncily, it needs . I wish tubedubber still worked.

I haven't been here for a week or two and just saw this after deciding to stick my head in for five minutes. I've not seen anything else that's gone on and I'm sure I'm missing a lot of context, but whatever's gone down, I just wanted to vouch for Thunderpeel: We've had our run ins with each other here, but we've ended up sorting them out either here or on the phone. In person, Thunderpeel is a gentle, humble and lovely man. Sorry to hear things have got bad, Thunder. I can really sympathise with this; I suffered low self-esteem for my most of my childhood, teens, and early twenties. It's not a quick thing to climb away from, and I think I still live with psychological artefacts of it now, but I've always found creative pursuits are one of the best ways to build self esteem, one project at a time.

Ooh. I often stare up at the balcony like a pleb when I'm passing through Sneinton market. I expect to see you wearing ermine and waving next time

I will always remember Richard Garriott for preaching MMOs as money printers from the stage at Develop, then Tabula Rasa failing horribly about six months later. Reyturner is right though: The best designers I know make loads of throwaway stuff, and tend to advise others to do the same. Those who get too attached to ideas really struggle; too much realising a vision and not enough experimentation and learning.

Man, that sounds horrible. I'm glad to hear your supervisor is understanding, and hope this stuff pulls together for you tegan.

Is there any state covered medical care, or would you have to pay one yourself?

I'm actually not. Sorry I missed that, and thanks for the link