Chris

Haha, this is super cool, well done.

It's a reference to a line from that Chuck E. Cheese video that Jake quoted in this episode--it's just a reference to Jake saying it from earlier in the episode. I haven't even watched the video, I just thought that phrase Jake quoted from it was hilarious.

Hooooly shit

Important If True 27: Join and Undermine Careful listeners might detect a hidden message in this podcast. Are you attuned to our frequency? Keep that in mind as you ponder these eternal mysteries: Is it better to smell a rose, or is it better to get your ass going? Are sneeze sabotage strategies all in your imagination? What's the deal with fidget spinners anyway? And does any of this matter? One thing is clear. At the end of the day, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em and undermine 'em. Discussed: fidget spinner, FÏDGT™, German artisanal heritage fidget spinner manufactory, Orson Welles peas commercial, the power of a Kamenstein Perfect Tear Paper Towel Holder in the palm of your hand, electronics devices with addictive sliding battery cases that are way better than fidget spinners, historical Ireland keyring, BABY, sneeze sabotage strategies and the supernatural, the history of sneezing superstitions, childhood guilt-inducing power fantasies, grownup elevator call button power fantasies, decoy crosswalk buttons that do nothing, battery powered by your sweat and tears, why you cry, marsh-dwelling weeping sadness robot, beach-dwelling laughing happiness robot, Brad Bird, The Incredibles, Ratatouille, Tomorrowland, adage-optimized objectivist wasteland, classic adages, breaking eggs to make an omelet, Brahma chickens fucking you up for breaking eggs, beating 'em, joining 'em, capitalism, undermining (metaphorically), undermining (literally), hoisting by undermining, creation of a self-reinforcing adage-backed worldview, redundant local newscasts, the historical emergence of local news, Cyber-Times, CyberTimes.com Send us your questions at questions@importantiftrue.com. If you enjoyed this and would like to subscribe to an ad-free feed, please consider supporting Idle Thumbs by backing our Patreon. Chris' Endorsement: Binging With Babish YouTube cooking series, and also the movie Big Night (Amazon, iTunes) Nick's Endorsement: Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches ("white bread, JIF peanut butter, and any preserve that you want") Jake's Endorsement: Shitty Mario novelty Twitter account, Supper Mario Broth blog of Mario deconstruction Sponsored by: Quip electric toothbrushes, WASD German-language video game magazine Kickstarting its English-language version Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes

Important If True 26: Get Hype U mad? Yeah, u mad. Look, get a hold of yourself, and consider these conundrums. If a driverless car has a driver, but the driver is dressed as a car seat, is Tom Cruise a passenger? If your DNA gets hacked by teens, which memes will you use to plug the holes? And what passive-aggressive slogan should you print on the jigsaw puzzle you give to your pharmacist? Get hype for this episode of "You May Be Retired, But You'll Always Be a Dentist." Discussed: man dressed as car seat, dressing for the job you want to have, staying incognito in a world of driverless cars, The Raid 2 car chase behind the scenes, injecting DNA with malware, precious meme blood cyberpunk future, hoisting via internet service convenience, procedurally generated Zazzle phrase clothing, waging a passive aggressive campaign using procedurally generated Zazzle phrase clothing, your dream app, gross millennial cuspers, coffee cupping, cupping, cuppers, consolidating your confusing online media library, boiling like a frog in a pot of apps, Silicon Valley billionaire teen blood drinkers, Thiel-hacking teens, heaven, living forever online, turning into dirt, get hype Nick's Endorsement: Chat Pack conversation starter cards Chris' Endorsement: Hunt for the Wilderpeople (Amazon, iTunes, Hulu) Jake's Endorsement: Funemployed party card game Sponsored By: Quip electric toothbrushes, Warby Parker eyeglasses home try-on Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes

Idle Thumbs BONUS: Ruination Online August 2017 Enjoy this bonus episode drawn from our Idle Thumbs Patreon Ruination Online! Each month, we do a livestream where all topics have been posed by high-tier backers of our Patreon campaign: patreon.com/IdleThumbs. Due to popular demand, we're releasing the audio of that stream to the main podcast feed for easier listening. We'll be back with a regular episode of Idle Thumbs next week! Discussed: Thumbs survival instincts, The WIZYs, Nintendo Horsebag, music composition, streaming, tiki drinks, hobbies, anticipated upcoming pop culture, arcade machines, Major Havoc, Marvel Cinematic Universe, being curmudgeons about the Marvel Cinematic Universe, video game trades, shoes Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes

This is always kind of how I heard it.

The claim that ketchup "has to" contain sugar by federal law strikes me as extraordinarily unlikely. That sounds like a classic piece of folk wisdom that sounds like it might be true but has no basis in actual law. I just looked up ketchup on the FDA website: https://www.accessdata.fda.gov/scripts/cdrh/cfdocs/cfcfr/CFRSearch.cfm?fr=155.194 The only single required ingredient is tomato (optionally including lemon juice for pH adjustment). Beyond that, it can include any combination of vinegars, sweeteners, and spices. "Ketchup legally has to contain sugar" sounds to me like the similar piece of folk wisdom that "Kentucky Fried Chicken was required to change its name to KFC because the meat they sell cannot be legally referred to as 'chicken.'" It's patently absurd because the word "chicken" is plastered absolutely all over their menu and marketing. EDIT: lol I wasn't even thinking about the fact that I'm posting in a thread of an episode whose artwork has the face of KFC's founder on it

Damnnnnn

(That was my bad, thanks Jake)

I learned much of what I know from the FlyerTalk forums. I don't spend as much time on them now as I used to, because a lot of the baseline information starts to get redundant and it becomes more about keeping up with every tiny new development, but I still have a slate of subscribed threads I check every couple days. It's an unparalleled resource for this stuff, I think.

This is truly profound

Twin Peaks Rewatch 50: The Return, Part 15 This week on Twin Peaks, things are either moving into position as the finale looms, or they are poignantly coming to an end. One Cooper hears a name he hasn't heard in 25 years, and the other Cooper finally asks about Judy, while Margaret Lanterman says a devastating goodbye, Ed and Norma finally get together and Nadine digs herself out of the shit. The end is very close! If you have a question for us or thoughts to share on the new season of Twin Peaks, write us at twinpeaks@idlethumbs.net. Looking for a place to discuss the season with fellow viewers? We recommend the Twin Peaks Rewatch forum. Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes

Idle Thumbs 278: Beef Chief Beef Chief [3/5 stars] We visited Thumbsland this weekend, and while riding Beef Chief I had fun with my son! So many ghosts every time I go down there! (Which is certainly not a problem.) I heard that burgers are real. I heard they're from burger church. I think about Thumbsland in my head, and it hurts, so I don't think about it for many years. Anyway, enough with the pleasantries! Come to our PAX meetup! (Saturday at 7pm at The Diller Room.) Discussed: Deus Ex: Mankind Divided, Planet Coaster, trailers, ethletes, the catacombs of Paris Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes

I've never eaten them so I'm not the best respondant, but for what it's worth, until Nick mentioned PB&J sandwiches, I don't think I'd heard another adult mention them for years.

It's time for the... Idle Thumbs Wizard Meet 2016 Pictured above: a wizard If you'll be in the Seattle area over Labor Day weekend, either to attend PAX West or because you live nearby, please join us for the 2016 Idle Thumbs Wizard Meet-Up! It's been a couple years since our last official fan event, and we knew we had to do another one when Spaff reminded us he has the perfect venue hookup: downtown Seattle's The Diller Room, an acclaimed bar featuring an excellent tiki drinks program. What could be better after weeks of watching Nick Breckon than to chill out with fellow Thumbs while sipping an expertly-crafted Zombie? We're expecting lots of Thumbs, including Chris, Jake, Sean, Spaff, and Danielle! Steve and Nick are still unconfirmed, so send them tweets saying they should come. WHAT: Wizard Meet at The Diller Room WHEN: Saturday, September 3, 7pm-10pm WHERE: 1224 1st Ave, Seattle, WA (Google Maps link) The event is FREE, so please show your appreciation for our generous hosts at The Diller Room by buying lots of excellent drinks and food!

Oh Nick is just as old an old man as I am.

Idle Weekend August 18, 2017: Sleepovers, Prey Tell? In this fine installment of Idle Weekend, we get really excited about (GOTY) Prey, the finest damned immersive sim this side of the solar system. Rob has finished it, and we spoil the hell out of the ending. We also talk about fun sleepover games: the games of our younger years that we enjoyed on an all-night basis with buddies. It's a very happy episode of idle Weekend! Prey Spoilers! Discussed: D&D, Donkey Kong Country, Perfect Dark, Sonic 3, Prey, BioShock 2, Kingsman: The Secret Service, The Dark Knight Rises, Jane the Virgin, WWE, Lucha Libre, Dunkirk, Atomic Blonde, On the Move (autobiography by Oliver Sacks) Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes

Idle Weekend August 20, 2017: The Mooch In honor of the Mooch, we go through our gaming torrid affairs: games we had a very brief, very intense love affair with. Sometimes, these things just don't work out. Discussed: Kingdom, No Man's Sky, Empire: Total War, Mass Effect 3, What Remains of Edith Finch, Ruse, 10 Cloverfield Lane, Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes

Here you go:

The Idle Book Club 25: The Long Goodbye Sarah and Chris discuss The Long Goodbye, Raymond Chandler's classic noir crime novel. It's a cynical, gripping tale of twists and turns, and it's a whole lot of fun. Join us! Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes

Idle Thumbs 310: They Came Through the Floor They're out there. They're at the gates. You can hear their indistinct scrabbling and inhuman gobbering. scrabbling and It's a strange and hostile world—dinosaurs, self-replicating weird car homunculi, The Thing—but that's why you built your house out of stone, after all. There's nothing to worry about…is there? One of the voices pierces the night and, pressing your ear against the thick walls, you strain to hear. "Come out, you piece of shit!" Discussed: West of Loathing, ideal game rating system, Production Line, self-driving car robot capitalist nightmare, The Isle, Rust, fair betting on competitive spectator games, hypothetical The Thing online multiplayer game, Grand Moff Tarkin Sponsored by: Squarespace, with the offer code "THUMBS" for 10% off Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes

Ugh this is so true, just think about it

See this is what I'm talking about, this is that Big Moon

Important If True 24: Eye Explodes, Brain Expands If a podcast could answer all your deepest questions about existence, would you listen to it? Before you answer, consider this week's conundrums: Does an Amazon shopping algorithm know your own home better than you do? Are meme GIFs contagious, and if so, can they give your hard drive a cold? When a security robot drowns in a mall fountain, is the robot played by Mel Gibson or Joe Pesci? Now, choose. (If you choose incorrectly, a robot will put you in a dumpster.) Discussed: Resin Pineapple Bookends with Gold Finish, 9.25" Purple Floral Print Terra Cotta Flower Pot, Amazon shenanigans, mall robot alleged suicide, Knightscope security robots, Minority Report, putting your wet phone in rice, putting your wet murdered security robot in rice, Knightscope security robot buddy cop film, robots that smoke, robots that vape, Mel Gibson, Joe Pesci, robot self-awareness, game theory applied to being put in a dumpster, eye explodes, laser comes out, brain expands, CRISPR-based gene meming, E. coli GIF infections, contracting a case of memes, original memester Eadweard Muybridge, beautiful organic data corruption, The Matrix but you're a hard drive instead of a battery, your hard drive catching a cold, Jurassic Park but like with Minions inside DNA or something, frozen meat from heaven, Italian sausage drug deal, Hansen's soda drug deal And here's that Brian Eno quote Chris haphazardly paraphrased: "Whatever you now find weird, ugly, uncomfortable and nasty about a new medium will surely become its signature. CD distortion, the jitteriness of digital video, the crap sound of 8-bit—all of these will be cherished and emulated as soon as they can be avoided." Send us your questions at questions@importantiftrue.com. If you enjoyed this and would like to subscribe to an ad-free feed, please consider supporting Idle Thumbs by backing our Patreon. Chris' Endorsement: Chipmunks songs played at 16rpm (Standouts: Walk Like an Egyptian, Heaven is a Place On Earth, Bettie Davis Eyes, Diamond Dolls, Jessie's Girl Nick's Endorsement: International Space Station Fly-Through 4K, An Inside Tour of the International Space Station 1080p Jake's Endorsement: 9.25" Purple Floral Terra Cotta Flower Pot Sponsored By: Quip electric toothbrushes Listen on the Episode Page Listen on Soundcloud Listen in iTunes