Zeusthecat

Can anyone tell me without any level of specificity whether I am stuck on a notoriously difficult puzzle or if I am just missing something that should be obvious?

This is the best thread I can think of to post this but I assume it will become an instant classic. Power Rangers toy with a boner This little snippet was really funny to me for some reason:

This is one that I never got more than 15 hours into. I found the combat to be pretty atrocious (seriously, why did half of my sword swings miss when I'm right in front of a dude clearly slicing his face in half) which made the early game very difficult for me which in turn discouraged me from ever picking it up again after my frustration levels piqued. Also, and this is probably because I was playing on the original Xbox, the graphical quality really hindered my enjoyment of the game. It was very dark and muddy and the draw distance was super low, which made the world feel a lot smaller and uninteresting than it really was. Given how much good stuff I've heard about the game and how much I've enjoyed Oblivion and Skyrim, I'm sure there's a lot more for me to love. Maybe I'll pick it up on PC one day and give it another go with some graphical mods or something.

Why hasn't anyone created a breed of dogs with opposable thumbs?

Still nothing and I've already logged 15 hours in this game. Right now I have two possible solutions running through my head. The first involves me somehow luring a feral chicken back to the chicken coop so I can murder and fry its remains, thus getting the crunchy chicken Blondebeard craves. I've tried using the biscuit in the hopes that I could lure them with the crumbs and I've tried getting the corn on the cob since chickens love corn but I haven't gotten anywhere despite my efforts. The second idea involves me finding something that I can lay across the broken bridge so I can get to the fort and aim the cannon at Blondebeard's restaurant. Maybe then I need to load it with a feral chicken and fire it through Blondebeard's open window. I'm pretty sure that's the dumbest idea ever but everything else has been a dead end so far.

Wow, if that guy still managed to show that much dickishness on camera I can't imagine how much of an asshole he normally is.

You make a pretty convincing argument. That does seem to come across a bit on the racist side. As for the female character, I'm just glad they didn't do what 99% of other games do and make the sole female some 70 pound woman with impossible proportions and giant breasts with jiggle physics.

Can you imagine walking into a bathroom and seeing someone staring in the mirror and winking while one of their eyelids were taped open? Personally, I would go grab a knife just in case.

That is so damn cute. For some reason it reminds me of a thing I watched called Animal Odd Couples

Tape one of your eyelids open and you can at least get half of the experience.

So it turns out the bounty system is pretty awesome in this game. A couple nights ago some asshole drove up to me and killed me just as I was about to hold up a convenience store. I re-spawned nearby and was able to take him out as he tried to speed off. I then quickly got in my car and started driving through the countryside to get away from him when I received a notice that he had placed a $9000 bounty on my head. Right as that happened a bunch of NPC mercenaries that he had apparently also sent after me rolled up in vans and started shooting at me from multiple directions. Since I was still in the countryside and had minimal cover I decided to initiate a mission so I could escape from the chaos without dying and losing a bunch of cash I had on me. I ended up staying in the mission lobby for the rest of the night and logged off after playing a few missions. Last night I logged in and I was immediately notified that I still had the $9000 bounty on my head (you don't lose the bounty unless someone kills you in free roam or you've survived at least a full day which amounts to 48 minutes). I stared at the map for a few minutes and when I saw that no one was coming after me to claim the bounty I decided to get back out of the city and drive to the northern edge of the map since most players typically congregate in certain areas of the city. So I leisurely made my way up there and found a good place to stop so I could go over some of my stats. After a little bit I switched back to the map and saw that 3 players were starting to converge on my location from various directions and they were getting uncomfortably close. So I took off as fast as I could and started heading south on the main freeway along the western coast. I paused to quickly check my map and saw that one of the guys had almost caught up to me and was almost close enough to start firing on me. Realizing that I couldn't afford to check the map any more and risk slowing down even for a second, I gunned it as fast as I could to try to get back to the city so I could take advantage of all the different routes and force him to keep checking his map to slow him down. The chase went on for at least 15 minutes and due to the damage that my car had sustained it was pulling to the right which I had to continuously correct for in addition to swerving out of oncoming traffic and trying to cause as much chaos as I could to try to slow my pursuer down. It ended up being a flawless run and despite countless near misses I was able to make it back to my garage in the southern end of the city while driving full speed almost the whole way and made it inside right before he caught up to me. The bounty still hasn't expired yet but I'm pretty sure if I can survive the rest of it the bounty money will go to me. This game is awesome.

Yeah, I think several people around here mentioned it being their favorite so no worries there. My opinion so far is that Secret of Monkey Island is the best of the three because of how amazingly well the humor worked in that game but I have thoroughly been enjoying all of them and they are all great games.

I hope that you have sons... Handsome, beautiful, articulate sons, who are talented and star athletes and they have their legs taken away. I mean I pray you know that pain and that hurt.

That is so terrible and wrong and sad.

Whenever I see Steve's posts now, his new avatar makes me read them in a Keanu Reeves whisper voice.

Mega Monkey mode is no joke. But despite the fact that I keep getting stuck I don't feel like any of the puzzles have really been that unfair, I think it's more that I have so many items that it's getting increasingly hard to pinpoint exactly what I need to be focusing on. The puzzle design itself is pretty damn solid so far.

I got a little further last night. First, I ended up going back into the restaurant with my chicken disguise and scared the shit out of Blondebeard. This landed me in a giant pot back in the kitchen area of LeChimp's ship. I spent some time trying to interact with all the food and vases nearby and eventually found that I could use the ventriloquist book to trick the dopey guy into taking all his pirate monkeys and abandoning the ship. One this had happened, I found that I had some chicken grease and a map to Elaine's location in my inventory. After looking at the map, I immediately assumed that it had to be the instructions for the stage lights. So I went straight for the theater, turned the lights on, and pressed all the buttons in the sequence indicated on the map. After completing the sequence, the lights were projecting an 'X' right near the tombstone on the stage and Guybrush indicated that that was where I needed to dig to find Elaine. I tried to go on the stage at this point but I was immediately forced to exit since Slappy Cromwell was still doing his juggling act. I poked around a bit more and noticed that the trunk in the backstage area was now open and there were a bunch of cannon balls that Cromwell was going to juggle as part of his act. Since Guybrush had commented a few times that he hoped Cromwell would fuck up, it seemed obvious that I somehow needed to try to sabotage his act to get him off the stage. So after unsuccessfully trying a few items on the cannon balls, I found that the chicken grease was the solution. As expected, once Cromwell started juggling the cannon balls, they slipped out of his hands and the show abruptly ended which finally gave me the opportunity to dig Elaine up and take her back to LeChimp's my ship. I played for awhile longer after finding Elaine but haven't made any further progress. I had hoped that I could somehow tell the third barber about golden Elaine or bring him to the ship so he could see her but neither of those was an option and it looks like that gold tooth is most likely the only thing that will suffice as 'treasure' to get him to join my crew. I spent a ton of time on the ship in the hopes that I could somehow pick up some of the food or use it with one of my items to end up with something crunchy but it doesn't look like any interactions will work with anything on the ship. I'm still fairly convinced that one of the objects on the ship will help me progress since I've been through all the other areas countless times and the only new item left in my inventory is the map to Elaine's location, but so far I'm completely stumped. This game is kind of hard and it's taking me much longer to get through this segment of the game than I expected.

Yeah totally. My friend and I are on most nights so hopefully we can start lining up all of our schedules more often so we can have at least the 4 of us teaming up consistently. We just need to entice a few more people from around here so we can delve into some of the races and deathmatches.

I can't fault you guys for getting bored with the game and quitting considering how slow the first 10-20 hours are and how many activities are still locked off. It is definitely the kind of game that you need to dump quite a bit of time into to really appreciate what they've done with the world and how fleshed out each activity and event is. Sorry to keep being an apologist for this game. If any of you guys still have GTA V and own it on PS3, I would recommend giving GTA Online a shot. There are 4 of us that have been playing almost every night and it has been an absolute blast. What's nice about it is that after a few basic tutorial missions pretty much everything is opened up right away with the exception of a few mission types such as parachute jumps or survival mode (which you can actually still do if someone that does have it unlocked invites you).

I don't know what it says about (American) humanity when the biggest tv event of the year, the Super Bowl, is watched by many people solely for the commercials. That is a really disgusting thing to me.

Good job everyone, that was the best!

Scarab, sorry I missed you last night. I was in a matchmaking session with another friend and couldn't accept the invite.

I hate those Progressive car insurance commercials with that stupid Flo character so much.

The Truman Show: The Video Game. You have a wife, best friend, job, etc. and your goal as you understand it is try to live your ideal, pre-ordained lifestyle. You go to work, spend time with friends and family, and do things that you supposedly enjoy to try to make the most out of life. As the player, you guide Truman through life and use your knowledge of his situation to steer the direction his life takes. The player's goal in this game is to try to obtain the highest ratings possible for The Truman Show, which is done in one of two ways. One way to obtain high ratings is to try to live your life in a way that fits with the vision of the show. As you do what you are "supposed" to, you are rewarded in certain ways. Maybe the show introduces new activities for you to participate in or maybe new characters are brought in for you to get to know, opening up new options and relationship dynamics. As you reach major milestones or achieve some tough goal you receive even better awards that help keep the game interesting and open up new avenues for increasing your ratings. If you follow this path through the entirety of the game, your true purpose in life is revealed to you on your deathbed and you die with the new knowledge that your life was a lie and you were the most influential/popular person in modern history. The other way to obtain high ratings is to try to break out of the confines of the show. You might do this by going places you aren't supposed to go or doing things you aren't supposed to do. By taking this approach however, the show's directors will try to throw weird and unexpected things at you to discourage you from deviating from the norm. These unexpected things could include radical shifts in weather, changes to the day/night cycle, and all sorts of unexpected interactions with other characters and the environment. Your ultimate goal in taking this path is to escape from the show and as you pursue this over time, Truman starts to piece together exactly what is going on and gets more adept at escaping from the cameras, which in turn gives him an opportunity to plan out and execute his escape from the show. This all culminates in a final push to escape where all kinds of shit is thrown at you as you try to make your escape. Then, at the end, you talk to the creator and a secret third option is revealed where you are given the choice to leave the show and make your triumphant exit or go back and continue to live your life, but with the knowledge of what your true purpose in life is. Somehow throughout this game you receive feedback on how you are impacting the ratings and there would be some direct correlation between how high the ratings are and what you can do or how much awesome shit happens. And the soundtrack would be even more amazing than the soundtrack for the movie. I don't know, that's all I have right now. Also, this game will use Unreal Engine 4 cuz graphics r king.

I'm not sure what I'm seeing. Is that a dude being launched 50 feet into the air by a rocket?