Obligatory Comical YouTube Thread II: The Fall of YouTube

[Ucantalas]

That makes me feel like I should go and watch some more Miyazaki films. I still haven't seen Howl's Moving Castle or Princess Mononoke.

[Ben X]

I saw HMC (dubbed) and didn't enjoy it that much, but Mononoke was cool.

[Nachimir]

[brkl]

Those will eventually be installed on the front bumpers of Google's self-driving cars. Wrong thread.

[Roderick]

I need to own a shredder now

[Stuart]

[Stuart]

The legacy continues. 

 

[Merus]

Also continuing the long tradition in internet comedy of making it suddenly dark when they run out of jokes.

[melmer]

[SecretAsianMan]

 

Coming soon to Goat Simulator (and I'm not even kidding, it really is)

[melmer]

[tegan]

Video games.

 

[Roderick]

"Delectable", because Geoff's brain needed an outlet for all the class he'd been storing unused in the Dew Bunker.

[elmuerte]

that. is. horrible.

[Ucantalas]

"Dew Bunker".

 

Ugh that sounds gross and sticky. I bet if you tried to walk through the Dew Bunker you'd lose a boot, like you would in a swamp, only this one is just glued to the floor with Mountain Dew Mtn Dew. And like... you can't light matches in the Dew Bunker because its so humid. There are probably sugar stalactites and stalagmites. Ugh.

And its really hot, and the more you explore the Dew Bunker, you realize the path leading ever inwards is warmer than outside... so you follow the twisting, turning corridors, hopping on one foot because your boot got stuck in the floor of the first chamber, eyes carefully sweeping the floor, trying to avoid any more sticky traps... The air around you gets thicker, denser. Sweat beads across your forehead and rolls slowly down your face, slipping into the gentle crease at the side of your mouth where your lips meet... you taste sugar. The sweet atmosphere has started to leave a sugary coating on your skin, washed into your mouth by the rivulets of sweat.

You hop forward, the air slowly getting warmer. Everything seems eerily... empty. Little remains beyond a few tattered Mountain Dew Mtn Dew banners and several upturned chairs. You see what look like blood splatter across the floor, but upon closer inspection you think it might actually be a spilled bottle of Mountain Dew Mtn Dew Code Red. As you continue trekking onward, a low hum reaches your ears.

On and on, every sticky hop makes the air hotter and the hum louder. Eventually you see a closed door in front of you. Approaching it, the hum has risen to a grand crescendo, and the heat is stifling. You grab the door handle and turn it, slowly, then push the door open, peering in.

On the other side is a dark room. A blast of warm air rushes out, and riding the wave is a pungent yet sweet smell, a musky blast of human sweat and sugary soft drink. Initially put off by the smell, you press on and enter the room. As you look around, you realize the room isn't completely devoid of light. Sporadically placed around the room are several television sets, all turned on, all displaying nothing but static.

You step forward, to get a closer look, when the door closes behind you. You hear a footstep, and then feel cold, clammy arms on you. One wraps around your neck. A hand grasps the top of your head. You feel pressure, the hand turning, moving your head to the right. The arm around your neck tightens, and your breathing is cut off. Your vision begins to go dim, and your head is forced further and further to the right. Before you lose consciousness, you hear a breathy whisper in your ear:

"Triple... X... P..."
 

 

[Nachimir]

(quoted because page change)

 

"Dew Bunker".
 
Ugh that sounds gross and sticky. I bet if you tried to walk through the Dew Bunker you'd lose a boot, like you would in a swamp, only this one is just glued to the floor with Mountain Dew Mtn Dew. And like... you can't light matches in the Dew Bunker because its so humid. There are probably sugar stalactites and stalagmites. Ugh.

And its really hot, and the more you explore the Dew Bunker, you realize the path leading ever inwards is warmer than outside... so you follow the twisting, turning corridors, hopping on one foot because your boot got stuck in the floor of the first chamber, eyes carefully sweeping the floor, trying to avoid any more sticky traps... The air around you gets thicker, denser. Sweat beads across your forehead and rolls slowly down your face, slipping into the gentle crease at the side of your mouth where your lips meet... you taste sugar. The sweet atmosphere has started to leave a sugary coating on your skin, washed into your mouth by the rivulets of sweat.

You hop forward, the air slowly getting warmer. Everything seems eerily... empty. Little remains beyond a few tattered Mountain Dew Mtn Dew banners and several upturned chairs. You see what look like blood splatter across the floor, but upon closer inspection you think it might actually be a spilled bottle of Mountain Dew Mtn Dew Code Red. As you continue trekking onward, a low hum reaches your ears.

On and on, every sticky hop makes the air hotter and the hum louder. Eventually you see a closed door in front of you. Approaching it, the hum has risen to a grand crescendo, and the heat is stifling. You grab the door handle and turn it, slowly, then push the door open, peering in.

On the other side is a dark room. A blast of warm air rushes out, and riding the wave is a pungent yet sweet smell, a musky blast of human sweat and sugary soft drink. Initially put off by the smell, you press on and enter the room. As you look around, you realize the room isn't completely devoid of light. Sporadically placed around the room are several television sets, all turned on, all displaying nothing but static.

You step forward, to get a closer look, when the door closes behind you. You hear a footstep, and then feel cold, clammy arms on you. One wraps around your neck. A hand grasps the top of your head. You feel pressure, the hand turning, moving your head to the right. The arm around your neck tightens, and your breathing is cut off. Your vision begins to go dim, and your head is forced further and further to the right. Before you lose consciousness, you hear a breathy whisper in your ear:

"Triple... X... P..."

 

Your unconscious form is taken to the centre of the Dew Bunker then sacrificed to the spreading, snaggle toothed flesh monster that reigns there.
 
The End.

[tegan]

I like to imagine that the heart of the Dew Bunker is kind of like that one really fucked up episode of Adventure Time where all the candy people are cocooned to the ceiling Aliens-style by some combination of sugar and deer saliva.

[Nachimir]

[melmer]

Are you ready?

For the funniest shit ever

[Nachimir]

Was trying not to laugh, completely lost it at 1:27.

[Ucantalas]

Mario Kart has ruined me. The entire time I was expecting a Blue Shell to fly in.

[melmer]

Who knew Wendy Ingraham was the greatest comedic performer of our time

[Nachimir]

Not sure if I've posted this before, but the guy in black is brill. Basil Fawlty in leathers:

 

[Roderick]

At some point during the Iron Man video I couldn't see, possibly because of the delirium, possibly because my eyes were full of tears. The last thing I witnessed were flailing comedy humans tracked by camera, one of whom was a 'stalker'.

[tegan]

Am I the only one who found that video sad instead of funny? It's pretty terrifying seeing someone's body shut down like that.