Jump to content
gdf

Life

Recommended Posts

On 3/22/2017 at 1:20 AM, Roderick said:

It's really shit when your body/mind gangs up on you like that without any warning. Is it a stress-related thing, or more something that depends on your personal level of anxiety?

 

The thing about regular panic attacks is that they come on with no rhyme or reason to your current mood, which then makes you scared that they could happen at any time, which then increases your overall anxiety levels.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know a lot of y'all are younger than me, so you may be a decade or two away from this.  But when the time comes that you have to worry about older parents/family, if you start having concerns about the people around them, don't ignore your instincts.  I did, and my last 6 days have included multiple conversations with the police, having the police to the house twice, multiple conversations with Adult Protective Services, visits with a social worker, doctors, nurses and several trips to my family's lawyer.  It was without a doubt the single most stressful set of days I've ever dealt with.  I'd love to tell the whole story, but even semi-anonymously on here I probably shouldn't given that there is currently an open investigation. 

 

The sad thing is that even if I had tried to act sooner, I'm not sure I could have got anything done, because it took a moment of crisis to get outside people involved. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hope things get better, Bjorn. Looking forward to watching you biotic charge into more nerds soon. :tup:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for the kind thoughts and words everyone! 

 

As stressful as this has all been, I think there's real silver linings in it as well.  I think, as near as I can tell, I got this nipped in the bud before anything really bad happened (although it was very close, this got to the point that one of the people "helping" mom actually picked her up and drove her to her lawyer's office to try and change mom's power of attorney, thankfully that didn't happen).  Mom was diagnosed with dementia last fall, and there's some memory loss, but her doctor and I both think she's still able to live at home with her dog for now, which is where she wants to be.  But spending most of a week with her gave me a much better feel for how she's doing and what she needs.  She had become isolated from her old friends, which can be common in early dementia because people don't want to let their friends/family see how they're doing.  So I got two of her good friends over visiting her.  Have her setup to be picked up to go to the senior center for lunches. Got her an emergency beeper ordered so she can wear it in case of another fall.  Got her on a wait list for a nurse to visit once a week and help her organize her meds (unfortunately small towns are desperate for medical professionals, and the health department is short staffed, so they couldn't start right away). Switched her lawn care to an old family friend who's going to check on her every week.  I've had plenty of complaints about growing up in a small town, but really that saved the day.  There were people I hadn't spoken with for 10-20 years that I visited, explained what was going on, and all they wanted to know was how they could help.  Mom and Dad have barely spoken for the last two decades, and even he wanted to help.  He was very sweet, he bought her lunch the first day I took her up to the senior center to eat.  An old buddy of mine who still lives back there was really awesome.  He was calling and texting me every day to make sure I was doing okay.  Having that kind of support and backup is the only reason I got through it without a total breakdown.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, Bjorn said:

I think, as near as I can tell, I got this nipped in the bud before anything really bad happened (although it was very close, this got to the point that one of the people "helping" mom actually picked her up and drove her to her lawyer's office to try and change mom's power of attorney, thankfully that didn't happen).

 

God, this seems to happen in every family situation where a parent gets dementia or Alzheimers: my mother's mother, my ex's grandparents, and a couple of my friends, just in the last decade. In all those cases, it was one "independently minded" friend or family member who decided that everyone else was fucking up the situation and tried to seize the reins through power of attorney, but this sounds somewhat more sinister. Sympathies, but I'm glad that the community as a whole has an outpouring of support for you and your mother.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
16 minutes ago, Gormongous said:

 

God, this seems to happen in every family situation where a parent gets dementia or Alzheimers: my mother's mother, my ex's grandparents, and a couple of my friends, just in the last decade. In all those cases, it was one "independently minded" friend or family member who decided that everyone else was fucking up the situation and tried to seize the reins through power of attorney, but this sounds somewhat more sinister. Sympathies, but I'm glad that the community as a whole has an outpouring of support for you and your mother.

 

Yeah, it's sad how often this happens.  But still, it's not the kind of thing I thought would happen to me or my family.  It's like, a thing you read about, or hear about, or see a Lifetime Original Movie™ about. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This weekend I won the Harland Awards for a sci-fi short story I wrote! The Harlands are basically the Dutch Hugo Awards, for best fantastic literature (sci-fi, fantasy or horror) both in short story form or novel length. It was a big ceremony in Amsterdam and it's been an insane couple of days since!

 

lineup-uitreikingen.jpg

 

I'm the guy in red, and yes my friends, that is an Apollo Justice cosplay I'm wearingEnglish language report here.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Roderick said:

This weekend I won the Harland Awards for a sci-fi short story I wrote! The Harlands are basically the Dutch Hugo Awards, for best fantastic literature (sci-fi, fantasy or horror) both in short story form or novel length. It was a big ceremony in Amsterdam and it's been an insane couple of days since!

 

lineup-uitreikingen.jpg

 

I'm the guy in red, and yes my friends, that is an Apollo Justice cosplay I'm wearingEnglish language report here.

 

Holy shit, congrats Roderick!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Roderick said:

This weekend I won the Harland Awards for a sci-fi short story I wrote! The Harlands are basically the Dutch Hugo Awards, for best fantastic literature (sci-fi, fantasy or horror) both in short story form or novel length. It was a big ceremony in Amsterdam and it's been an insane couple of days since!

 

That's amazing, Rodi. Congratulations!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks, everyone! I'm currently debating what my follow-up step could be. I'm thinking it might be a good thing to translate the story into English and offer it to a handful of international publications. There've been a few instances where winning the Harland Awards was a step-up to bigger things. (My life is currently mostly answering emails and social media messages though.)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×