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I love how polite your disagreement is Mangela.

I meant to respond to this earlier, but then I forgot and only just remembered.

My disagreements with my mother are only polite at a distance. I only made my mom cry once while I was down there this time, and it wasn't in public. I'm counting that as a win.

I'm unapologetically, uh... Radical queer left? I'm hard to pin down politically. My parents watch Fox news 24/7. Things are weird while I'm there.

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I don't know where to share this, but I will do it here. I work/help at that video game camp I did the promo video for some weeks part time, usually it's fetching things, helping kids with Photoshop/animation, or playing a game with them during free time.

 

During free time at the end of a session two weeks ago, I ended up joining in on the Luigi's Mansion minigame in Nintendo Land. Myself, two sixteen year old boys, and a 10 year old girl and boy was the line up. At some point the non ghost players were coincidentally walking single file in a line down the hall and one sixteen year old boy says to the other, "we look like the human centipede." I kind of chuckle and they laugh, we keep playing for like 20 minutes more. One of the older boys leaves to go to something else and another one of the camp counselors shows up and joins in. We probably play for about 10 minutes more until we happen to be in that single file line again and the 10 year old boy stands up and shouts in the cutest little boy voice, "Huuuumaaaan centipeeeeede!"

 

The other counselor was trying to stop laughing so he could tell the boy not to say that but also could not explain why he could not say that. I think I should probably explain to the counsler the context of why that happened at some point, but I like it the way it is.

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That's pretty great, gerbil. Kids are the best. I miss working at a camp.

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Going to a psychologist tomorrow. Pretty nervous that i'm making a big deal out of nothing. I don't know though.. Ill at least get some perspective on myself.

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Hey, that's awesome Akidu.

I think we tend to minimize our own problems. Takes a lot of guts to be able to open up to someone! Hope it works out well for you.

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Good for you! Talking about yourself can be really difficult, but it definitely helped me get through some difficult stuff. I hope it goes well.

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Life has been happening so hard the last two weeks or so. I've traded all of my money and all of my time for a new apartment and a girlfriend. There were a lot of really expected tribulations and expenses, and some unexpected ones. The bed frame I bought was hot garbage, so wrangling a new one and sending the old one back was a pain. About two days after moving in, I discovered a pest problem, which thankfully seems to have been taken care of. The desk that I inherited for free is like 20" high. Not really ergonomically correct, to be honest. That'll be addressed when the new one comes tomorrow.

 

The lady was complete serendipity. She told me she messaged me out of the blue, we exchanged phone numbers, we met for water ice with my car completely full of moving boxes. She basically demanded to help me move, so a woman I'd met for the first time saw my ramshackle apartment the first night I slept there. We've only not seen each other two days since then, and I'm seeing her at least 3 more days for sure through the end of the week. It is insane. Everything is happening in fast forward, but none of it is bad. I'm nervous and excited. Some really good stress happening at the moment.

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Sounds like good stuff Badfinger, but, what's water ice?

Knew that was going to get asked. It's Italian Ice, which is a frozen dessert, but people in the Philadelphia region are weird and need their own words for things (water ice, hoagies). It's a consistency somewhere between shaved ice and sorbet, and traditionally is fruit flavored (when I think of default/basic Italian Ice it's lemon).

 

http://www.ritasice.com/ is the best place to go. They have good frozen custard, too (which their website tells me they won't be serving anymore because of eggs or something).

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Going to a psychologist tomorrow. Pretty nervous that i'm making a big deal out of nothing. I don't know though.. Ill at least get some perspective on myself.

 

I hope this goes well for you. I'm having a hard time finding anyone around me who has an available slot.

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I thought everyone knew what a hoagie was because of Day of the Tentacle!

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My phone just deleted all of my text messages out of nowhere and I'm beyond devastated. The entire physical record of my current relationship, as well as a couple of previous ones, is just... gone, because of some glitchy SQL overflow that's been a known bug with Android since the very beginning. I have no words and I am humiliated at how much it has spoiled my day, maybe my week.

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Finally! I'm going to see my psychologist tomorrow and hopefully get some new meds.

 

Gabapentin has been.... Idk... I see myself getting angry and my suicidal thoughts have become a wallpaper for my brain, but then again, I've always dealt with that and Gaba isn't suppose to fully suppress or level those thoughts/feelings. Abilify is suppose to, but I had a very bad reaction to that. So, here's hoping for something better tomorrow.

 

Had a horrible dream last night: I was living in this weird apartment and my friends and people who I've created as love interests for my dream, were coming in and out. They were sleeping in my bed, and think this was an obtuse build-up to the terrible part of the dream. I remember people leaving and there were two or three TVs on and blaring. I turn them off and I hear a groan coming from my bedroom; the groan sounded like the person was dying and in pure fear. I go to my bedroom and I see a man, and underneath him was a woman who is slowly killing him with a knife; the groan then took on a more primal feel and fear.

 

I just stood there and watch, but only for a minute or less, but it felt like a long time. Within that minute or less, I felt like I invaded someone else's dream, like their fantasy. There was an atmosphere of perversity and eroticism in the air.

 

The man groaned again and it took more of a tone of death and pure fear, that shook me to my fucking core; I knew almost instantly that that was the sound of someone dying and dying in a terrible fucking way. 

 

After that minute of taking all that in, I flied from the room and the killer went after me, and then I woke up. 


That groan is still lingering in the back of my head.

 

And this is why I hate sleeping. I get the worst fucking dreams. 

oh well, what can you do. We all have our shit to deal with.

 

My phone just deleted all of my text messages out of nowhere and I'm beyond devastated. The entire physical record of my current relationship, as well as a couple of previous ones, is just... gone, because of some glitchy SQL overflow that's been a known bug with Android since the very beginning. I have no words and I am humiliated at how much it has spoiled my day, maybe my week.

It's terrible to lose something of great value, especially memories of past lovers and companions. At least you still have memories of them and how you felt when you were conversing with them

 

oh... I'm so sorry Gormongous. I hope you feel better.

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My phone just deleted all of my text messages out of nowhere and I'm beyond devastated. The entire physical record of my current relationship, as well as a couple of previous ones, is just... gone, because of some glitchy SQL overflow that's been a known bug with Android since the very beginning. I have no words and I am humiliated at how much it has spoiled my day, maybe my week.

 

I use Google Voice, which keeps a record of that stuff in my Google account.  It's probably too late now but maybe a thing to think about in the future.

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My phone just deleted all of my text messages out of nowhere and I'm beyond devastated. The entire physical record of my current relationship, as well as a couple of previous ones, is just... gone, because of some glitchy SQL overflow that's been a known bug with Android since the very beginning. I have no words and I am humiliated at how much it has spoiled my day, maybe my week.

 

I forgot to backup my texts when I went from my Nexus 4 to 6, and I was incredibly bummed at the conversations I lost to that. 

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I use Google Voice, which keeps a record of that stuff in my Google account.  It's probably too late now but maybe a thing to think about in the future.

 

I am becoming an expert in backup solutions, after the fact. Actually, I had to stop, because it was making it worse for me. I also briefly bricked my phone using a third-party data recovery program, which helped me to move on.

 

Anyway, thanks, everyone. The great thing about the Thumbs community is that people come out in force to feel for you even when it's dumb shit getting you down. I talked to my girlfriend and she mentioned something about using one of those iPhone backup programs to make me a PDF or HTML doc of our first four months of texts. It would maybe be the best homemade birthday present that I could imagine, because I'm clearly a historian at heart.

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Wow... so for the past hour or so, I've been having this really strange feeling. It's a sensation where I'll look at my arms and feel like they're not mine. I can still move them and control them normally, but somehow it feels like watching somebody else move. It's not interfering with my life in a major way, except that I feel like I'm going crazy which is terrifying. Is there a name for this so I can look it up and see what could be causing it?

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I think the most generic word for that is xenomilia (very not sure), but I think that applies to long term sensations like that? It could be a starting place though. Maybe there was some super ordinary name for it too, like the opposite of phantom limb syndrome.

This kind of thing is dangerous to look up too much, though! It can be like going to WebMD and finding out that you have a horrific intestinal disease that is going to kill you immediately, when in reality you just gotta poo.

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You're right... I've found all sorts of explanations for it in the past few minutes. Some people say it's an unusual symptom of stress and anxiety, and other people say it could be an indication of a serious brain disease.

 

I think I'll just try to sleep it off for now :)

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Wow... so for the past hour or so, I've been having this really strange feeling. It's a sensation where I'll look at my arms and feel like they're not mine. I can still move them and control them normally, but somehow it feels like watching somebody else move. It's not interfering with my life in a major way, except that I feel like I'm going crazy which is terrifying. Is there a name for this so I can look it up and see what could be causing it?

You're right... I've found all sorts of explanations for it in the past few minutes. Some people say it's an unusual symptom of stress and anxiety, and other people say it could be an indication of a serious brain disease.

 

I think I'll just try to sleep it off for now :)

 

I've had what I think of "meat gloves" syndrome several times, especially during college and grad school, and it was always a combination of insufficient sleep with a sudden spike in stress. Sleep always fixed it for me, I'm sure it'll be the same for you. Sleep tight!

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It hasn't happened in a long time, but it used to be if I was staying up reading when I was really tired, my mind would kind of bug out and it would suddenly feel like the book was being held much, much further from my body than it was (like dozens of feet away, but I could still read), to the point that it felt as though my arms must have been disconnected from my body to be so far away.  Kind of a weird, tunnel vision type illusion.  After initially being freaked out by it, I then always found it to be a fascinating experience when it would happen and I'd try stay there as long as possible. 

 

Not exactly the same, but there is a lot of weird perception illusions your mind can play with you, particularly when lack of sleep is involved, as Gorm said. 

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I thought everyone knew what a hoagie was because of Day of the Tentacle!

 

I don't think you should drink that.

 

-

I find it odd you guys save text messages, but it makes sense, like keeping letters. I think my phone deletes stuff after 30 days, never bothered to change it. I suppose I live in a strange world where I communicate with almost everyone through Facebook messaging instead of texting besides when my wife needs something, which logs your stuff until you delete it.

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Had a horrible dream last night

...

I just stood there and watch, but only for a minute or less, but it felt like a long time. Within that minute or less, I felt like I invaded someone else's dream, like their fantasy

...

Holy shit dude. That sounds awful.

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