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Roderick

Stupid free newspapers

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I guess spam is okay too then? So you get spam, and I guess if you want you can then send a message back saying "I don't want any spam!", which will probably bounce, and that's the last you'll hear of it that day! Until the next day! Awesome!

Free newspapers == spam.

Making someone cry is harsh and stupid but karma neutral in this case, I think.

There isn't someone in my inbox asking me if I'd like to receive 100 spam e-mails today. You're talking about the equivalent of one of these newspaper people running up to you and shoving a newspaper into your back pack, or purse, or your pocket.

And, what Thrik said.

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On a related note, at Nottingham train station you often get companies like Adidas or whatever giving you free cans of deodorant and milk

Aw man, I guess I always miss that. Just Metro.

Once upon a time, I used to hand out flyers at night for the cookie club in nottingham. The best thing about it was the sheer badass apathy of the drunk people I was meant to be "marketing" it to. You could say anything and they wouldn't hear.

Strange cult. "cheers mate".

Dead tree? Waste paper? Sticky dancefloor? Fuck the environment? Nuke the whales. Burn a tree. More clearcutting. Tax breaks for the rich?

While I was flyering with a chinese guy: Phillipino husbands? cheers mate (you bastard, he said).

Reconstituted woodpulp coated in inks wrung from molluscs and similar bivalves? (Nicked from the inside cover of Amiga Power)

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck, etc.

Free piggyback rides? Free kiss? Free Nelson Mandela? Get run over by a bus? Shitty nightclub?

Learn how to kill people and get away with it? "Cheers mate". Douchebag? "Cheers mate".

These are all flyerisms we actually did at the time. My favorites were a series based around serial killers: Go karting with Fred West? Candlelit dinner with Myra Hindley? Tandem skydive with Jeffrey Dahmer? Tai Chi with Peter Sutcliffe?

About 1 in 100 actually paid attention. The best was when a guy replied "Dyke!" to a punk girl and she replied that if he came closer and said that, she'd bite his bollocks off and spit them in his mother's face. He was so cowed. It was ace, and I wish I'd filmed every minute.

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There isn't someone in my inbox asking me if I'd like to receive 100 spam e-mails today.

So you read all the spam you receive?

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There isn't someone in my inbox asking me if I'd like to receive 100 spam e-mails today. You're talking about the equivalent of one of these newspaper people running up to you and shoving a newspaper into your back pack, or purse, or your pocket.

And, what Thrik said.

Fine. You win, THIS TIME.

Although they do shove newspapers into my hands or hold it horizontally in front of me like a stop sign which is almost as bad as shoving them into your pocket or backpack, even when I don't actually grab the newspaper. They think they're doing you a favor by giving you something that is free, which is very different from people who, say, ask you directions and who have a genuine reason to bother you. I'm always ready to be nice to those people. But the newspaper people should just stand there ready to give you the newspaper BUT NOT BOTHER YOU. It's a public space and they're spamming it. RANT RANT RANT RANT.

P.S. Most of the things Nachimir wrote would make me stop and laugh and take the damn flyer.

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Also charity pushers.

Chuggers (n) : a concatenation of the words "charity" and "mugger"; used to describe the faux pious, mock-jovial fucks who stalk city centres with clipboards and a thoroughly despicable "Hello, best mate!" manner.

I hate those fuckers; every bastard time I leave the office to go find some lunch I'm assailed by at least 3 of the nosey cunts:

"Hello, what have you got in your bag then?!"

"A multipack of 'fuck off' - would you like one?"

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No. What's your point?

Well, maybe somebody is asking if you would like to receive 100 spam email.

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"Hello, what have you got in your bag then?!"

"A multipack of 'fuck off' - would you like one?"

lol

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God yes. Greenpeace is everywhere in this city. Even ignoring the fact that I hate them (Patrick Moore, one of the founders, said it best when he left because it had been hijacked by politicos who don't actually give a fuck about the environment and just want to eliminate anything right-wing) I don't like being blocked on my way into the coffee shop I frequent when I walk to work. Yeah, I walk to work. And school. I don't emit any carbon except for when I exhale. Leave me the fuck alone, Greenpeace.

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It was neither you nor Ginger, Lawrence... it was Spaff. Dan is bitterly trying to win an argument by blaming you for something Spaff did three or four years ago.

However I bet none of the staff cried about it as much as they'd cry if you screamed at them until they cried.

Anyway I agree with Ginger, they're free newspapers, shhhh, calm down. Charity beggars are teh worst becuase they keep coming at you and and at you with the intent of stealing your money, and then most of the time they'll guilt trip you too. Like once when I had no money for Christmas as I'd lost my job shortly before it, and I had literally only enough money to buy Spaff a Nightmare Before Christmas model thingy that he really wanted, and I hid it by putting it in a massively oversized cheap christmas bag... you know, the ones you get for £1 in pound shops and they're AWFUL.

And then some Charity Cunt chased me down the street yelling, "Oh that's a big bag you got there, bet it's full of expensive presents! Some kids don't have a christmas you know! I won't take a minute of your time, I won't take your money, I just want to make you aware of the plight of some children? No? Hello? No? Okay, well enjoy that fat bag of presents you have, I'm sure you'll have a good christmas! Unlike some of us. I guess it's just good that you obviously have enough money to buy presents you know. I guess it's fun to have money. Not like some of us" (blah blah blah)

And they hold out their arms to stop you from walking past which I find really invasive...

Also, you think those guys really give a shit about their cause? no way. Spaff's sister did charity begging for a few months to SAVE MONEY UP FOR TRAVELING, because you get paid about £9 an hour to do it, plus commission on everyone you steal from. And they also get to stay in a nice hotel in Bristol with all their expenses and food paid for, for a week, while they "train". Bullshit.

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Wow, we get a lot of charity pushers in the center at summer, but they're always respectful and cheerful and back off if you tell them no. I don't really mind them. The charities probably get a lot of money through them, from people who wouldn't be active enough to donate otherwise. Plus being approached in Finland is such a rare occasion, I don't mind if there's an ulterior motive, especially when the charity pushers tend to be so damned cute.

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Yeah, that does seem a slightly extreme example Yufster. I've never come across any that bad, but if I did I'd be obligated to literally tell them to fuck off. Physically blocking you from carrying on is crossing the line.

In fact, getting their name by feigning interest and then phoning up their employer and mentioning a harassment/invasion charge might go some way to getting that particular bad egg off the streets. :tup:

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That sounds nice...

Here, there's this ONE STREET that ALWAYS has them. I hate walking down that street. It's like struggling through a crowd of thieves. There are SO MANY, and they all walk in front of you and spread their arms out wide as though they're going to hug you, but really it's so that you have to step around them or stop. Then they say, "hey, can I have just ONE MINUTE of your time?" which is a lie because it takes about ten minutes at LEAST before they stop waffling and get you to hand over your credit card details.

Also, as for the money they make... If they're getting £9 and hour, plus food and accomodation in a hotel for one week, let's say that makes their first two weeks of employment cost... hmm... five days accomodation in a hotel, plus food, plus their first week of wages... £500 roughly? That's the first two weeks alone, and not counting the cost of paying the training person or travel expenses (which is also paid for them, and in Spaff's sisters case was quite expensive too - Brighton to Bristol)

Then let's say every person they thieve from, gives them a £2 donation per month.

You're not going to get more than five people a day, on the very best of days. That's a stretch. Katie usually got one or two people, on rainy days maybe not even that.

They're going to have to get 250 people to sign up before they begin making a profit from ONE charity beggar.

Does that not strike anyone as odd? And pointless?

Plus for the average team of 5 beggars at various different ends of streets, that's 1,250 people before the team starts to make a profit...

And that job has a massive staff turnover, since it's generally just a summer job for students....

...wtf?

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It was neither you nor Ginger, Lawrence... it was Spaff. Dan is bitterly trying to win an argument by blaming you for something Spaff did three or four years ago.

Actually I did do what he described, last year in the Latin in the Lanes.

Anyway on topic. Yes the street charity pushers are ridiculously inefficient for charities, I don't understand how they continue to exist. Perhaps they're hoping for greater exposure? But it's exactly the wrong sort of exposure.

Once a friend and I were both caught out and gave our details, but the company was thwarted later when they phoned to confirm. We went on holiday to egypt so my friend got to say to the caller "sorry I'm in cairo, can't talk" and then they called me moments afterward and I said the same thing. I really wish I could have seen the look on that guy's face....

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I was speaking to someone recently who works in a call centre hiered by charities to follow up sign-ups and stuff. The call cantre charges £5 per call made, whether or not it results in a subscription (and very few do). The bosses act all self-righteous and tell people they are doing good work, despite the fact the a fair few of the charities actually lose money from this.

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And they also get to stay in a nice hotel in Bristol with all their expenses and food paid for, for a week, while they "train".

Best replenish my stock of fuck off then... :(

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they all walk in front of you and spread their arms out wide as though they're going to hug you

Suggest hugging them, followed by "Hi, I'm a pickpocket" or "Hi, I have tuberculosis".

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Just today I read an article in the biggest newspaper in the country about how charities have been getting skyrocketing profits from face-to-face marketing. But of course this is Finland, not the UK.

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Suggest hugging them, followed by "Hi, I'm a pickpocket" or "Hi, I have tuberculosis".

Given that I'm stopped almost daily, I believe I will. The problem for me is that both Kensington Rd and Stephen Ave, two of the three busiest upscale commercial scenester-y streets in Calgary, are on my walk to work. And each is like running a fucking gauntlet. If I just hug them quickly and keep moving without saying a word, at least I can make them look stupid.

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...especially when the charity pushers tend to be so damned cute.

Yeah, that's one thing. Why do the charity beggars always have to be cute 18-20 year old girls who come smiling and asking if I want to donate some money.

At least around here they are.

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Yeah, that's one thing. Why do the charity beggars always have to be cute 18-20 year old girls who come smiling and asking if I want to donate some money.

At least around here they are.

Consider yourselves lucky.

I only ever see over-confident prick Alpha males, who're probably just doing it so they can legitimately harass cute girls. :eyebrow:

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Consider yourselves lucky.

I only ever see over-confident prick Alpha males, who're probably just doing it so they can legitimately harass cute girls. :eyebrow:

Same here.

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I usually only get approached by female members of the clip board mafia, they try to flirt and play on their sexiness (which is severely lacking in many of them,) I take my free hug and bid them a good day.

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