Jake

Important If True 9: Wetzel's Podcasts

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Important If True 9:

Important If True 9


Wetzel's Podcasts
No one asked us to answer these questions. No one asked these questions at all, but as hosts of this podcast we must do our best: If a tree falls in the middle of a forest and it doesn't leave a will, who gets all its stuff? What's hidden in Chef Boyardee's past that someone really, really wants you to know? And when you met a robot in the mall who could see through time, space, and maybe reality itself, what do you ask it? We'll need your help with that last one, but leave the rest to us.

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Discussed: knife-wielding stabbing machine, The Tree That Owns Itself, Pepper the robot, Wetzel's Pretzels, Chef Boyardee, dumpsters

Jake's Endorsement: Better Call Saul (all seasons on Amazon & iTunes)

Chris' Endorsement: Sliding down the stairs on your heels as a kid (or something)

Nick's Endorsement: Walking an unfamiliar city alone

 

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Short Circuit (1986) was a movie about Johnny 5, a prototype military robot that gets hit by lightning, becomes sentient, and tries to escape the company that built it.  Batteries Not Included (1987) was a movie about a pair of drone-sized, sentient, robotic UFOs (and eventually their tiny robotic offspring) helping to save an apartment building from property developers.  Apart from both having sentient robots, the two films have nothing to do with each other and one is certainly not a knockoff of the other.  Johnny 5 is naive and sassy in the way that a 5 year old who watches too much TV is.  The UFOs don't speak at all but for the most part are friendly and benevolent, only becoming aggressive after one of them is attacked.

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This is why we deserve the robot uprising. Look at this Furby when it dies. It's a nightmare.

 

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* batteries not included was also an Amblin movie so very Spielbergian.  Plus it was similar to Cocoon in that it was an 80s sci-fi movie with Hume Cronyn and Jessica Tandy.  I mostly remember it being a light-hearted comedy more than anything.

 

...whoa, and I just looked it up, it was also one of the first screenplays by Brad Bird.

 

Short Circuit, of course, is these days also known as the movie series where Fisher Stevens is in brownface playing an Indian character.  There's a good rant about it in Aziz Ansari's Netflix series.

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The Wetzel's Pretzel's story has two weird twists (ugh):

 

1) According to the LA Times:

 

Quote

They wrestled with finding a name that could be trademarked. Everything Phelps wanted had already been taken. Wetzel, who had been teased in the schoolyard with "Hey Wetzel, you pretzel," kept his mouth shut. But it was inevitable. A friend who was a marketing consultant finally pointed out the obvious — that not using Wetzel and Pretzel would be a complete waste.

 

(emphasis mine) Lending evidence for the hypothesis that Rick Wetzel was teased as a child, scaring him into silence during this naming session.

 

2) If you go to the Wetzel's Pretzel's website, and look at their team, you get to see a bunch of fun flipping panels, including one of Rick Wetzel:

ZXZq2mX.png

 

In case you hadn't noticed, everybody. Strategic initiatives! Sinful Cinnamon! 

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The number of robots you guys encounter is becoming suspect. You say you fear the robot uprising, yet you sure find yourself conveniently among robots frequently. I'm not saying Jake got replaced by a robot in Hawaii, but it would explain his positive, yet inexplicable, reaction to the knife robot. 

 

A really good move is actually sliding down carpeted stairs in a sleeping bag. The polyester-y material on the outside reduces friction that should be helping to protect your kid body from doing something really dumb, and instead you can just fly based on your level of gumption. 

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When you guys talked about robots wielding knife, but how about robots wielding katanas? not just wielding, but doing with the same skills (or close) as sword master ? because this really exist in Japan:

 

 

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On 4/14/2017 at 8:18 PM, Valorian Endymion said:

When you guys talked about robots wielding knife, but how about robots wielding katanas? not just wielding, but doing with the same skills (or close) as sword master ? because this really exist in Japan:

 

I will one up you and do a robot wielding two handguns

 

 

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45 Brains Update

Submit your own proposals for brains to @45brains on Twitter. 403 podcasts remain.

Spoiler

 

#12 - Robot That Can Stab You 61 Different Ways

12.png.4e41c03121158fbf65981cd072ecac19.png

Robots can be creative.

Status: Proposed

Message: "This one's an original!"

 

 

 

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You can totally get killed by wind, just maybe not directly from the windforce, more from falling off bridges or something

 

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